Kink Clubs Convo

Kink Clubs Convo

Scarlett Sophie​(sub female) • Sep 18, 2023

Hello and howdy hey!

My Dom broached the idea of going to a BDSM club together at some point in the near future - I've never been to such an establishment and while the thought has me very excited, there are some nerves mixed in there as well. He has been a few times and shared His insights with me, but I was curious to hear from the broader community...what has been your experience going to kinky clubs?

All tips and tricks, stories and exploits welcome and appreciated!

helenvm • Sep 18, 2023

its embarassing for a sub but also exciting

djinni​(dom female){smplylaura} • Sep 18, 2023

What???

TopekaDom​(dom male) • Sep 18, 2023

The main thing is not to interrupt a scene. There will be new and different things going on around you. You can watch all you want, but don't make yourself part of the act. If there is something you can't handle, walk away. If you have questions about how things are done, wait til it is all over and then you can ask politely.

If you think things are going wrong and dangerous, inform a DM. That is what they are there for.

Other than that, don't touch what is not yours and enjoy the sights and sounds.

MsLas​(sub female) • Sep 18, 2023

Over the last 18 months, I’ve been to a variety of kink clubs in the Mid West and for me the experience depends a lot on whether I’m attending fetish night at a swing club or going to a dungeon or dedicated BDSM space.

If it’s primarily a swing club, the vibe can be more sexually charged and there are often play rules you don’t have to deal with in dungeons. For example, at the two swing clubs in Columbus, BDSM play is only allowed in specific areas. Additionally, because the attendees have less knowledge about BDSM, scenes tend to get interrupted a little more frequently there. I’ve been in a rope scene and had three people walk through it to get to a nearby bed to have a threesome right next to us. There’s also a LOT more drinking happening at these clubs (most are BYOB).

Overall, these are decent places to go to and the people are generally nice and welcoming. And there are always exceptions to what I described above… The Body Shop in Pittsburgh is a swing club, and I’ve been told by multiple people that their fetish nights are awesome and there’s some pretty edgy kink happening (needle play, heavy bondage, wrestling/rough body play). Also, Club Princeton in Columbus has a monthly fetish party that I go to every month and it’s fantastic and very well attended (125-150 people).

Dungeon and BDSM-specific spaces tend to be a little smaller and have a slightly more chill vibe to them. The ones I’ve been to like to start off the night with a little social time to give people a chance to catch up with friends or negotiate your scenes before they turn out the lights and turn up the music. Some may even offer short classes or demos before the party starts. Also, many of these places are dry and don’t allow any alcohol or marijuana (even if you have a Rx). There are almost always dungeon monitors and many of the more experienced people watch out for others as well. A lot of times, people will ask if you’re new, and if so, they’ll give a quick run down if the place, introduce you to some people there and offer to answer any questions you might during the night… we enjoy welcoming newbies to our local scene. We want you to have a good time so you come back.

Scenes will get interrupted less frequently, many times because others watching the scene or the dungeon monitors will step in before someone is able to. That said, I was at a BDSM dedicated venue for a party on Saturday and my scene was interrupted during the breath play part of it. A couple of months ago at the small dungeon I go to most weekends, I was suspended in rope and I asked my Top to bring me down asap because I could feel nerve compression happening in my right arm. And someone chose that moment to step into our area and ask my Top a question about the shock collar he was using on me earlier.

Interrupting a scene is not just rude, it’s super dangerous, especially for the bottoms. So whatever you do, please don’t be that person and don’t hesitate to stop someone you see that’s about to do it.

That was probably way more information than you were looking for, but I hope some of it was helpful.

Good luck and have fun!

TopekaDom​(dom male) • Sep 18, 2023

No such thing as too much information. Good job!

Miki • Sep 19, 2023

What everyone else said but in summary.

Relax, you're not going alone.

Keep your hands to yourself

If uncomfortable tell Master-baiter it's time to leave. No letting him dom-push you into staying. Point blank:

Go Directly Home. Do Not Pass Go; Do Not Collect $200

Little Vixie​(sub female){Mgh30} • Sep 19, 2023

I go to a bdsm swingers club and it's a blast.
1. You will see things that you may not be comfortable with. Keep an open mind.
2. Do not yuck on others Yuma. It will get you thrown out if you are badmouthing others because you do not like what you are seeing
3. Do not interrupt others scenes, but you could be invited in
4. Most places use the stop light safe word system

Sincorrigible​(sub female) • Sep 21, 2023

The first time I went to a club, I was blown away. The sights, sounds, outfits, toys.

It was like things in my head, things I'd read, things I'd fantasised about, all of a sudden came into sharp focus. And then some. I remember feeling excited, aroused, shy, unworthy. And delighted. At the freedoms in action around me. People living out their kinks and fantasies. I was new to the scene, and knew nothing really.

I went with a 'friend' (who shortly lived down to the cliché of 'mentor dom pouncing on scene newbie') so I didn't have the added frisson of being with a sexual/play partner. That would have made the experience even more exciting and mind blowing I think.

Miki • Oct 10, 2023

Hm so you pretty much went it alone.

Write me how it went please..

I describe as "retired" but situations like this..


I''m game I am geting hungry to serve..