Deserving to be served

Deserving to be served

chattel​(sub female) • Nov 30, 2023

When I met the Master that became my very first owner in a BDSM situation I felt very early that he deserved to be obeyed and pleased, long before I even understood what that meant. This is a difficult feeling for me to have felt and use as a measure of who I submit to and serve in the future. Perhaps that is too high an expectation. 

Sincorrigible​(sub female) • Nov 30, 2023

Absolutely not. It isn't too high an expectation at all. I feel precisely the same way. The first man I called dominant made me feel I wanted to submit. I asked him if I may. Because I looked up to him, respected him, wanted to please him and be found pleasing by him.

I have had subsequent relationships where I felt the same. That is my standard. I have to look up to the man in question. In that way, in my head, they deserve my obedience and submission.

I've played and had mini relationships with others where I didn't necessarily feel that way, and that's fine and you can do a lot. But ongoing real submission. I don't think you can do that long term if you don't feel they deserve it. (just as I don't think a dominant wants ongoing submission in the end from a woman who they don't respect and admire).

The painful part is waiting to meet and connect with someone where you deem each other the right match, where you look up to each other in that way, if that makes sense. (especially nowadays with so many player-lights in the game)

Miki​(masochist female) • Nov 30, 2023

Definitely not. That you came to want to do that and enjoy it means you're in the right space.