Chances to become (Play)Partner

I admire how much time and effort You always invest in Your posts Mr.Heero

Me too! Especially when the questions being asked have been asked so very many times! Such patience and generosity. I don't have it in me.

Thanks for your Replies on this here, and i´m sorry for asking a question thats so often ask here.....

OK, I see. Well, in that case, unless it is for your own sheer curiosity, I still don't think a post like this would be particularly helpful.

Here are some things for you off the top of my head--if you care to know my opinion or advice given the limited information I'm working with : (A bold assumption on my part, I know. Nonetheless, we shall forge ahead bravely.)

Put in the work, be patient, and perhaps get personal help:

Alright, I know I know. You HAVE been putting in work. And you HAVE been patient. But by this I mean putting in a different kind of work and understanding what patience really means (you do NOT want to become desperate! Yes, I know it feels tempting and may be warranted, it does not matter. Do NOT become desperate!). The same tactics will generally get the same results on average. We can't count on luck, and we can't count on the right person just finding you. Life rarely works that way, even though it may seem so sometimes. But it's one of those "luck favors the prepared" sort of things. So you will likely have to switch up what you're doing somehow. I can't tell you exactly how, because I don't know exactly what you're doing. But it seems "switching it up" is likely going to be necessary.

I know you will have your reasons/suspicions for why nothing has "happened" yet, but I assure you, your experience is way more common than you would think. I do not have a weight problem, and while I am introverted, I am not afraid to talk to girls and tell them I'm interested, and STILL it takes me a lot of time and effort and patience to bring any meaningful relationship into being. And if you read a lot of the posts and blogs on here, you'll see that many people have the same issues. (And, by the way, you may think that this really sucks, but I think there is a benefit to this, and for your partner to see you doing this. I don't advocate hard work for hard work's sake. It benefits both you and your partner if a decent amount of effort is put in to searching for, creating and maintaining your relationship. It is also beneficial, for all involved, for you to be someone who's not afraid to put in effort in general. Whether it's a Dominant or Submissive, no one wants a lazy partner.)

Now, you *may* get "lucky", but in all likelihood, a very small percentage of the conversations you start will end up going anywhere at all. And a fraction of those will actually end up in a relationship that's really fulfilling in any sort of way. And yes, I won't lie to you, if you have a weight problem and worst, aren't addressing it, it will make the numbers smaller. Physical attraction is just a thing you will have to contend with. It's relationship math. Just take this as a given and move forward. Once you get that, now you just know that you have to take the actions that gives someone in your position the best chances of landing something real. And odds are, if it hasn't happened in a VERY long time, you're going to have to do something different, and likely something that is a bit out of your comfort zone. It's not going to be a walk in the park, but you seem like a nice guy, I believe you can have this and deserve it.

Now yes, I would admit that I sent you a lot of information. But lamenting that it is is the wrong approach in my opinion. READ the info. Were there any suggestions that you haven't tried? Then you should start to try them! (One change at a time probably. Start with the ones easiest for you.) Is there anything in the articles that you ARE doing, but the articles suggest doing them in a slightly different way? Then, make sure you understand the idea/mindset behind the method, and tweak what you usually do to fall in line with that.

Do you mostly approach women online? Then maybe it's time to start attending munches and kink events. Do you already attend munches and kink events? Then maybe you want to work on your approaches, tweak what works and note what doesn't. Work on your shyness. This may even include something counter-intuitive like putting your goal of finding a Domme on hold for the moment and focus on just making friends. A woman who rejects you may not give you a reason at all, or give you a false one to spare your feelings. A friend will tell you, "nah, what you did there is considered cringe these days" or "I thought you came on too strong" or, just as useful, they'd be there to reassure you "nah, you dodged a bullet there! Consider yourself lucky!" Sometimes what you should do is just find someone who was in a similar position to you and asked them how they found success. What did they do that you're not doing? If you're cool with them, could they potentially have their Domme look you over and give you tailored suggestions?

The journey is different for everyone, but in my experience, tends to be a challenging one for most. There are people who have approached me to essentially be their wingman. There have been times I've acted as a Protector to a sub. There have even been times when it is became the best thing for a sub and I to part ways and I help them find someone else. It has been a struggle every time So get in the mindset that this is going to take some grit and personal growth and just get it done.

You know what you want, that's great. Now tweak how you try to get it. Hope alone is not enough.