UpFromTheAshes(switch gender queer)
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7 months ago •
Mar 29, 2024
7 months ago •
Mar 29, 2024
It sounds like you may hold some views of yourself, your own worth, and your profession that need to be examined (and perhaps talked through with your partner and other loved ones). Where do these insecurities come from? And once you have found the root of them....is your Daddy really likely to do the same things or the things you're afraid of? Do YOU believe that you're worthy of love and attention and care? Why (or why not)? Are you feeling fulfilled in your relationship or dynamic? Do you feel like you're allowed to be yourself, or are you putting on an act in your personal life?
You said "Although I'm very honest with him, you just never know." There should be signs.....have you talked to him about these feelings you're having? If so, what has he said in response? Does his behavior match his accepting words? If not, what does his behavior tell you?
You should also work to find ways to convince yourself that it's okay, for yourself. Remind yourself (out loud, if it helps) that your Daddy loves you and cares about you and accepts you for who you are. Ask for those reassurances from him where you're able to do so. Work yourself through any cognitive distortions you may be having (one such may be "sex workers are unlovable" ------> Sex workers are human. Sex workers are deserving of the same care and love and compassion as any other human. Sex workers provide services that other people value. Sex workers are individuals, with their own lives outside of sex work. Etc)
I perceive a lot of self-deprecation in what you've said. For my part, I believe that being a sex worker should have no bearing on your worthiness, your lovableness, or any of those other things.
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