What do you think of subs owning other subs?

What do you think of subs owning other subs?

TopekaDom​(dom male) • Jun 21, 2024

Ok, yes technically this makes the owner a Switch, but go with the flow on this one:

Relationships can take many a form within the lifestyle. But in working on my next set of stories for Silvia, I am thinking of changing things up a bit in her world. Her journey has been as a sub and then a slave. With the death of Matt, her world has come full halt. Is it time for something different for her?

Now for the change, I have some "real world" experience in this . Years ago, I knew a Dom who had a slave (A), who in turn had a sub of her own (B). B had a married couple (C & D). A would Boss around B, and at times C but not D. It seemed to work for all of them, but I thought it was odd. At least 25 or so years ago.

Anyway, Do you think it is "right" for a sub to own other subs?

Discuss

Miki​(masochist female) • Jun 21, 2024

I would think anything goes with this. I have met people in similar situations although not quite as your story would unfold.

I have seen doms with multiple subs and there was the guy's main squeeze, to use a dated expression and 2 even 3 other subs who not only did his bidding but hers as well and the ones I saw would on occasion choose a lesser sub to be her "property" either short or long term.

Going with the flow as Sub A was more or less a switch, but not in regards to the dude running the show but the "lesser subs"

Those were also the ones who got the shitty chores: Clean the bathroom, take out the trash scrub floors--all that nitty gritty household dirty-hands shit.

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Whether or not this is in line with what you or others are looking for I can't say. It's just what I have seen, people I have known over the years.

VictorKingston{I&A} • Jun 21, 2024

I think, if we are just ignoring the very concept of a switch and their capacity to consensually engage with partners outside of a specific dynamic if everyone including their Dom is on board because submission does not remove agency outside of predetermined negotiated instances, this sounds like a BDSM multilevel marketing scheme.

Dom A telling sub B that if they recruit two submissives of their own they too can own their own diamond encrusted paddle. This ends with someone owning a garage full of ball gags that they just cannot move and Dom A sitting on a throne of lies.

fluffypoppet​(sub female){Protected} • Jun 21, 2024

Is there anything a sub can't do?

By nature, I am submissive.
- I prefer not to be in charge, but I need to know *someone* is in charge... which means, at times, under circumstances when there is a lack of sound leadership, I'll step up.
- I've also been told by more than one Dom that I trigger unexpected submission in them.
In my view, none of that undermines or contradicts my natural submissiveness.

I don't identify as a switch.
I do recognize that switches exist.
I know a submissive who is submissive or Dominant, but not interchangeably in the same relationship and doesn't consider herself a switch.
I know another sub who has a mistress who is submissive to her own Dominant.

Poly relationships often have a hierarchy.
One partner may be a primary or nesting partner.

Anyway, I think the only rule is consent so if Silvia finds someone that inspires her to feel Dominant, that is totally valid. In the same way that not every Dom inspires every sub to submit.

This was fun to think through.

aradialspire​(dom femme) • Jun 22, 2024

It's a bit like getting a pet for your pet 💀

I think it's also important to remember that submissives are whole people with rights and boundaries. They're not slaves who have ceded their rights and responsibilities to a Master or Mistress, so I see nothing wrong with them having some sort of outside arrangement as long as it doesn't "bring mess into the home," so to speak.

I don't always have the bandwidth for social engagement, so if my sub-partner wanted to engage on their own time with someone else, I think that's great. If we keke'd outside our scenes as Dominants about the trials and tribulations of submissive partners, all the better! I've actually had that happen, and it can be quite hilarious.

I have always been able to separate the object in a scene from the person outside of it, though. It could be difficult if you're a 24/7 lifestyler and have to "share your toys" or see them in other contexts. But who a person is to me may be radically different from who they are to/with another, and that is completely okay. They will always be Ara's little bucket of shit no matter how close to the sun they try to fly <3

Solace​(dom male) • Jun 22, 2024

Abiding by the ignore the switch aspect of this...

It seems like a polyamory question. No, not all D/s dynamics are romantic or sexual but quite a few are, the probable majority even. Even if not, it's natural to desire ones partner to be entirely engaged with a mutual commitment.

I will add that I had a couple of girls at once at one point and it was amusing to watch the sort out a sort out a pecking order. But outside ladies under my care...my gut right now says not my personal thing.

To each their own though.

Sweetlydepraved​(masochist female){Mostly} • Jun 22, 2024

I want my own submissive male one day. The closest thing to ever touching me sexually would be allowing him to cum on my feet and lick them clean. I don’t know if that will ever happen but it doesn’t necessarily make me a switch, because I’d never be with Daddy if he was someone I could switch with. Not throwing shade on switches, it’s just my preference.

I'mME • Jun 22, 2024

I love this thought process.

I think it's very doable. The people involved though, may have to have a few separate rules that apply to the sub having a sub.

When I first removed into this, I ended up changing my profile to include a Dom and a sub.

Lmao. Ohhhh, You don't know how many different people stopped by to talk about this.
Some to dress me down, some curious, some wishing me luck.

I realize not all subs would want/need a sub. However, submission can be many things to many people. I'm going hold off on what I was going to write.
I have another thought but the words are not flowing w/o sounding a certain way.

tallslenderguy​(other male) • Jun 22, 2024

i don't see this as a question of "right" (or "wrong"), or even correct or incorrect. To me, there is no static framework or absolute definition or standard of D/s, it comes down to the individual needs/wants of the parties involved.

I see our sexuality on a spectrum, and my sub parts are intertwined with my sexuality. On an infinite spectrum, that i view as not only linear, but multidimensional, there's always going to be someone on either side of us/me... someone 'more' or 'less' "sub" than us/me. Add fluidity, which i do not see as necessarily "switch."

For me, "ownership" is a deeply psychological bond, the word "possession" feels more of a match to my individual need/desire. i want/need to be possessed by a Guy Who wants/needs to possess me, but i find the meaning of that hard to describe or explain? For instance, i perceive control as a major ingredient to a possess/possessed dynamic. Yet i can/have experience/experienced both being controlled and controlling in my interactions with a Dom. When i am lying prone underneath Him and He is using me to pleasure Himself, i feel "owned" and "controlled." When i am pleasuring Him using my mouth and hands? There seems a sort (degree?) of transference of control to me.

i wonder if ownership in a relationship can be one sided, depending on how one perceives/experiences ownership? Maybe on a gross or, 'on paper,' sense... but in the ongoing experience? idk

aPeepingMom​(sub female) • Jun 22, 2024

What a wonderful topic, TD. Like many things here on The Cage, it’s probably not a matter of “right” or “wrong”, the answer depends on the individual’s experiences and goals.

For Sylvia, having her own sub or slave could just be part of her growth. I’ve heard about Doms who started their path under the tutelage of a Mistress, they learned how to be the Doms they are by learning what it was like to be submissive to someone else. But does that make the Dom a switch?

Maybe having her own submissive or slave will help Sylvia learn more about the “burden” a Dom carries while caring for her submissive and make her a better sub in the future. Or maybe she will realize that she enjoys it and will continue on the path and be a Mistress for others, teaching and training them before sending them off to a Dom/Domme of their own.

I think it would be an interesting journey for her.