Time Away/Not seeing your Dom

Time Away/Not seeing your Dom

tictackid​(sub female) • Jul 3, 2024

I just wanted to post this to get advice, or support, on what to do or how to handle not being able to see your Dom for a long period of time.
I’m someone who holds quality time as a very important thing in a relationship and as a love language. So I guess I am open to hearing any advice on how to make the time apart from one another easier or fun ways to distract yourself or other things that you can do 🥰
I’m all ears and really appreciate this platform in giving me a community where open discussion is common

juliankay • Jul 3, 2024

Hello Ms TicTac - look as a Dominant myself I completely understand the challenge of being apart from your Dom for extended periods, especially when quality time is a significant part of your love language.( as i would expect it from a sub that i was training ) and yes long-distance dynamics can be tough, but there are several ways to manage and make the time apart more bearable and fulfilling....so if i can have the liberty to offer more than just 5 cents ( per Lucy in Peanuts)

First do you have that open Communication: Keep the lines of communication open. Regularly scheduled check-ins, whether through text, calls, or video chats, can help maintain a sense of connection. Share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences with each other to stay emotionally connected with your dom.

Engage in activities that keep you occupied and help distract you. Keeping yourself busy can make the time apart more manageable.

As a Sub explore ways to maintain intimacy online. This might include sharing your daily experiences, ( as i would have my subs provide daily E journals) exchanging letters or notes, or planning virtual dates. While it’s not the same as in-person interaction, it can help bridge the gap.

and If possible, plan and look forward to future visits. Having something to look forward to can make the time apart more bearable and give you both a sense of anticipation and excitement....not for an encounter or session but time together.

Use the time apart for personal development. Focus on your goals, interests, and self-care - via self love ( if your dom permits) . Growing as an individual can enhance your relationship and make the time together even more meaningful.

Discuss and set goals for the time - what you will do when you can be together.
Lastly trust and patience are key. Remember that being apart is temporary and that the strength of your bond will help you both through this period. It’s important to find what works best for you and your Dom, and to communicate openly about your needs and expectations.

I hope these suggestions help, and I’m here( DM me) if you’d like to discuss further or have any other questions.
Hope this helps.

Miki​(masochist female) • Jul 3, 2024

"All ears" I like that...

"Juliankay" has it pretty much covered. Keep busy, see if Online interaction floats your boat, and above all "Communication" is paramount.

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Otherwise and of course IMHO, in your shoes I'd also want to know why this guy needs to sojourn elsewhere. Career related? Family issues or illness? Heading off to the Big House to cool the ol' heels for a stretch? --- (That's tongue in cheek: But being sent off to the House of Many Doors is a valid reason for an extended absence)

The importance of the reasons for flying the coop, however temporarily, can be taken into consideration in determining the importance he sees in the relationship. I mean, heading off to Bear's Ass, Montana to "go fishing with the guys"--- well, one reads into that what one will.

But... back to the "Communication" thing... keep him in the loop as to how you feel about this absence.

Best of luck and always keep smiling.

tictackid​(sub female) • Jul 3, 2024

Thank you both so much! Those were both very thought out and responses I really appreciate, thank you for taking the time out of your day to help me

LoveandDevotion​(sub female){Looking} • Jul 4, 2024

I'm in a long distance relationship with my Master too. He lives a little over 3 hours away and we both have a lot of responsibilities and other barriers keeping us from being together all that often. Thankfully he's coming for the holiday weekend and I can't wait. However, most of our relationship is long distance for now.

We text whenever he's not at work or otherwise unable to. We talk on the phone several times a week. And we text during his breaks at work. Since we became a couple at the beginning of March there was only one day we haven't texted at least once and it sucked so bad. He was visiting his mom who lives in a dead zone for his cell phone carrier so he gets no signal there and she didn't have wi-fi so he couldn't even message me over the Internet. Happily his mom has since gotten wi-fi so hopefully that never has to happen again 😝

I tell him everything and love having him to share my life with. I would much rather have him here or me there obviously, and hopefully we get there eventually, but for now we do share life with each other and have been there for each other through personal crisises, going both ways, in the past few months. My life is so much richer for having him in it.

So basically my advice is communicate, communicate, communicate! If he's not willing or unable to do that, long distance may not be doable.

InATimelyFashion • Jul 4, 2024

Both check in take a photo with location so you know both are safe show honesty. That you at least have video call few times a week text back and forth make time for each other. Find some sub/domme friends and your person here chat it up in the chatroom or go play a game or Virtual place to go out dancing or listen to music still stay here. All depends on what your relationship is if only online or part time companionship directed to long term. Because if its long term few months lets say 6 months I would be clear about meeting few times in public places after few times if they are safe willing to go do things in public not just all way's the bedroom you still need to grow the bond you want to make sure the spark was the same online it takes a year to get to know someone. But if they not willing to meet or beat around the bush make excuses and disapeer when on the phone or chat likely they are married got someone. But when you get more serious with someone all the cards need to be on the table cause that both got a plan what you want to do should be on the same page. Cause you look up someone number on FastPeopleSearch you can see if their wife name on the number so on and social you won't have to worry doing background check it does it for you when you see pictures with someone else ya wish them well. Yandex also you look up photos also. They not willing to cam their whole house then they not single a single person does hide stuff even if they got a roommate you should have to shhh ether. Don't go by sweet words go by sweet effect and blue prints. I could understand tho if your poly or this just companionship only or just training but still. When honesty and trust is broken can never be again best walking away. Some one really wants you will show it not keep your waiting even if they are sick when they can talk if they gone weeks and months forget it that meant they lie gone someone else are their other partner don't play their game play it smarter. Don't wait around for anyone that does wait for you they should be pouring the same or they nothing. It's their job to show you guide you be upfront you will do your part as team work. I have seen people go years one person does want to meet you gotta make a choice if you stay loses your chances finding someone that do better. Protect your soul and mind submission earned not given even in real when meet a few times they not yours yet its more of trial run you need to see if they treat you good as online they should not hide you should be day light not back in corner. Be selective , does this support your mental and life?. They need be willing to support your dreams and goals allow you to have friends and people they be good to your dog and cat. If they are not kind make you change things tell you cant have this and that they are not the one only abuser will try to trap you won't let you grow. You need to able to grow and bloom. Maybe I am little strict but looking for ya your safety rest is up to you. They need meet you half way in the middle many people have done it just both have to make it work. if they just want live in and maid and sex that not a relationship its a game get smart everyone deserves be number one with out the party lifestyle and grown only needs one. They need be rea to responsibility lead and cherish. It's not all sex its more of bond love and trust sex is last thing. One got together taking the time not pushing you person takes time the tine takes slow and shows. Ones that rushes you with love is not the one.

Black Eyed Peas - Meet Me Halfway
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I7HahVwYpwo

No Doubt - Underneath It All
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RvuVFHTvdaY

Meghan Trainor - My name is No
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cMTAUr3Nm6I
Jennifer Lopez - Ain't Your Mama
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pgmx7z49OEk

House Talion​(dom male) • Jul 6, 2024

Keep yourself busy
Work on hobbies
Try online gaming
Exercises
Don't masturbate too frequently unless otherwise commanded