TwinkleEyes{N/A}
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2 weeks ago •
Nov 2, 2024
[quote="Solace"]These are all good talking points but there's a lot to answer to. I'd like to disengage as I feel I've already beaten this dead horse with a few members here, but it also feels rude to not respond to others who appear to have directed statements or questions to me.
I feel this is a good healthy discussion amongst members of our community here. We all have had varying opinions, some are the same, while others disagree. It is a good posting. Solace, I appreciate your voice here. We may not always agree. However, I’ve found you to be respectful of your differences with others. Passion and judgy anger are 2 different things. I’ve never found you to be judgy just a difference of opinions. |
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Online now
lambsone
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2 weeks ago •
Nov 3, 2024
@ Solace
"Starting with lambsone, I'm not particularly interested in creating an exhaustive list of what would be interesting topics I feel I'm missing out on. That seems an unfair standard to uphold on the spot. Nor is this about reclaiming some conversation I feel have been stolen. " To be fair and to clarify, I never asked for these things at all. This is something you thought up in your own head. I just asked for clarification about what you psrticularly were looking for regarding a meaningful conversation, that's all. I've seen meaningful conversations recently and it's been civil. But there seems to be something missing in recent posts that you particularly are needing. I was just trying to find out what it was. Your response to Ophelia helped clarify that a bit for me. |
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dollMaker(dom male)
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2 weeks ago •
Nov 3, 2024
Solace wrote: dollMaker wrote: As one of the voices folks are pointing at, accusing of derailing forum threads, do you not see the hypocrisy in what you are asking for. You want your words and ideas given space in which no one can challenge them? How is that healthy? Its not, particularly when some think attacking minority groups, questioning their right to exist be, never mind out and out misinformation is being discussed on here - so that should just go on unchallenged?. So there is no room to offer a challenge to that? You want people like myself, and others who regularly offer more informed views to what, shut up, go away and allow hatred free reign.
The threads that I can think of that were strongly and robustly challenged were those types, threads created to discuss people's gender choices, being trans, or racism in bdsm communities and play spaces. So those just get given a by ball, allowed to run their course, in what the interest of freedom of speach? And not challenged. Got to say that is how this thread is reading - please let us discuss our vile, uninformed, ignorant, hate filled views without those being challenged. So one group wanting another to go away and say nothing, limiting what can be said. Seriously? Its what you are accusing people like me of doing - hypocrisy much. I think it disgraceful that all of this came out of a thread -now closed, and no I did not report it- seeking to discuss larger women, in away that sought to demean them, view them as a statistic, a fetish - not human beings. Do you really think that's got educational merit, re the lifestyle, to discuss over-eating as a pleasure source, to do statistics on how many women on here overeat - identify as bbw? Seriously, that is the hill you want to die on regarding what is amazingly, wonderful, highly educational bdsm/lifestyle content - something you want the sites rules adjusted to protect? Really? Its deeply sad to me, that so few people saw how deeply troubling that thread was, or indeed in the past how other threads were started just in the interest of asking inappropriate things, all innocently...... I thought this place had hit some lows before, but this is a new one. You're welcome to feel that I am new muddy low for this community, as I often have the same take with your viewpoints. But neither of our opinions matter, just because we don't enjoy the turn of a conversation doesn't mean it isn't valuable to another group of people or even our own in ways we do not expect. You may not like it, but real diversity is being in proximity to new experiences including what you may and may not enjoy. The trick is being tolerant enough to exist near them, and brave enough to face them when they make you uncomfortable. . My comments were not addressed to you specifically therefore I did not use @ yourname, but more a general reply to all. No, writing on here which seeks to other people, to rob them of their humanity, deny their right to exist, has no value, except to out the hate of others, this has nothing to do with diversity, and everything to do with anti diversity, and as such its not a question of tolerance, this sort of energy should never be tolerated and othering I will not tolerate - either online or in inperson spaces. These types of othering energy I have zero tolerance towards, and I will call out when I see them expressed on here which sadly they have been with alarming regularity. As to the last bit you say, I am not going to respond to it. I have said what I felt this thread required, thought long and hard, re read and debated with myself whether to respond or not, response made so as of this moment I am out. |
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Solace(dom male)
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2 weeks ago •
Nov 3, 2024
dollMaker wrote: Solace wrote: dollMaker wrote: As one of the voices folks are pointing at, accusing of derailing forum threads, do you not see the hypocrisy in what you are asking for. You want your words and ideas given space in which no one can challenge them? How is that healthy? Its not, particularly when some think attacking minority groups, questioning their right to exist be, never mind out and out misinformation is being discussed on here - so that should just go on unchallenged?. So there is no room to offer a challenge to that? You want people like myself, and others who regularly offer more informed views to what, shut up, go away and allow hatred free reign.
The threads that I can think of that were strongly and robustly challenged were those types, threads created to discuss people's gender choices, being trans, or racism in bdsm communities and play spaces. So those just get given a by ball, allowed to run their course, in what the interest of freedom of speach? And not challenged. Got to say that is how this thread is reading - please let us discuss our vile, uninformed, ignorant, hate filled views without those being challenged. So one group wanting another to go away and say nothing, limiting what can be said. Seriously? Its what you are accusing people like me of doing - hypocrisy much. I think it disgraceful that all of this came out of a thread -now closed, and no I did not report it- seeking to discuss larger women, in away that sought to demean them, view them as a statistic, a fetish - not human beings. Do you really think that's got educational merit, re the lifestyle, to discuss over-eating as a pleasure source, to do statistics on how many women on here overeat - identify as bbw? Seriously, that is the hill you want to die on regarding what is amazingly, wonderful, highly educational bdsm/lifestyle content - something you want the sites rules adjusted to protect? Really? Its deeply sad to me, that so few people saw how deeply troubling that thread was, or indeed in the past how other threads were started just in the interest of asking inappropriate things, all innocently...... I thought this place had hit some lows before, but this is a new one. You're welcome to feel that I am new muddy low for this community, as I often have the same take with your viewpoints. But neither of our opinions matter, just because we don't enjoy the turn of a conversation doesn't mean it isn't valuable to another group of people or even our own in ways we do not expect. You may not like it, but real diversity is being in proximity to new experiences including what you may and may not enjoy. The trick is being tolerant enough to exist near them, and brave enough to face them when they make you uncomfortable. . My comments were not addressed to you specifically therefore I did not use @ yourname, but more a general reply to all. No, writing on here which seeks to other people, to rob them of their humanity, deny their right to exist, has no value, except to out the hate of others, this has nothing to do with diversity, and everything to do with anti diversity, and as such its not a question of tolerance, this sort of energy should never be tolerated and othering I will not tolerate - either online or in inperson spaces. These types of othering energy I have zero tolerance towards, and I will call out when I see them expressed on here which sadly they have been with alarming regularity. As to the last bit you say, I am not going to respond to it. I have said what I felt this thread required, thought long and hard, re read and debated with myself whether to respond or not, response made so as of this moment I am out. Thank you for your contributions to the topic then dollmaker. I would think you to be relieved to learn that no one is out to deny another person their right to exist. Frankly that would be murder and its highly illegal in every country I know. However if you do honestly believe that such discourse does exist on this platform as frequently as you choose to speak out about it, then you may need to consider that your own words fall into that exact category. You are only choosing who you prefer to accept, and your evaluations are on very small part of who a person actually is. I would point out that it is certainly easy for me to perceive your voice on forums as quite hateful and certainly seems intent to rob people who you disagree with or believe do not have a right to voice their thoughts and exist here. Quite literally what you just said you intend to do. You're the same coin, just the other spiteful side. The whole point of this forum is not even to say they you shouldn't be allowed to be that way though. The point is that when tension like that wades into the conversation and people respond with equal energy, the conversation ends for everyone. If that's someone plan, to be rude just they can end a discussion...I don't think that tool should exist. On paper I agree with calling out excessively hateful speech, however the bar seems often quite low for this, to the extent that rather moderate opinions are being called out at times. Even if the opinions are extreme by one or several persons standards, they still deserve a voice and opportunity because ideas that were once extreme are now the norm. I won't lecture on the history but will bring to mind the history of slavery, gay rights and women's suffrage. |
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intenseoldman(dom male)
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2 weeks ago •
Nov 5, 2024
Okay, I'll wade into this.
First of all, I doubt there's more than three people running this site. With premium subscription the only source of revenue, don't expect any changes that cost money. As I understand moderation, it's a free-for-all on the playground until someone rats you out. Then there's an investigation and the "not nice" players get moderated. I have been investigated a few times and had one blog post banned. I guess you win some, and you lose some. Once "Villanelle" gave my blog post a "love" when they reposted it. It's a pretty big honor getting that Villanelle love, especially after an investigation. If a forum thread gets shot in the head, I would imagine the moderators had too many complaints and most likely deemed the OP's intentions, however innocently veiled, sinister. It's not too hard to see through OP's. Axing a thread in that case is best for everyone, especially when you don't want that toxicity to live for a million years as some threads do. TY, Villanelle. I'm fine with the level and method of moderation we have. It isn't perfect, but it's good enough. To be honest, don't you think the owners want a little forum drama? At least, until someone gets hurt.... then, yeah, you gotta be responsible. As far as other changes go, I would love to see a filter/search engine on this site, but that would cost money. You see any of that floating around? Like droves of new members wanting to subscribe to a cannibal party? On that note, I would like to see the community change. That costs nothing... just a little human decency. Maybe, don't intentionally try to hurt vulnerable people. You can disagree, be impassioned, and call people out without getting ugly. Most of us do. However, it doesn't take more than a few bad actors to stink up the place. If Villanelle decides to axe their threads, start a new one that's more respectful without sinister intentions. |
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