Using people’s given name

Bunnie • Dec 17, 2024

It’s a pretty dick move. I think sometimes people name drop too to use others as “validation.” ‘I’m associated with this person (in this case I know them so well we associate by given names)… so I’m the “real deal.”
Hopefully Admin can do something to at least help stop it from continuing.

Grizzledoldman • Dec 17, 2024

The way the world changes and evolves is fascinating. When I was young (and dinosaurs ruled the earth) and we were referring to someone with whom we only had a casual relationship (read that as barely knew them), we would call them by their surname only. They were peers so there was no Mr. or Mrs. or Miss, simply a last name. We didn't refer to anyone by their first name unless we were VERY close to them: family, best friends, life partners, etc...

Time passed and who among us would give anyone whom we barely know our surname . Bringing us to now when to even identify yourself by your proper given name can be dangerous. It is far too easy to extend small intimacies (a name) into identities.

So while I might trust a person with my given name because I trust that person, I don't know the people that they know. And I might not trust them at all.

All that to say: what the fuck? Why, in today's world, would someone EVER share someone else's real name (even a given name) with another person? Not only is it impolite and possibly dangerous, but why the hell are they talking about someone else that is not a part of the conversation being held?

Surely there are better, more informative, more enjoyable conversations to be had with people than talking about someone not there.

I'mME • Dec 17, 2024

I DID NOT READ ANY OTHER ANSWERS AFTER READING THE POST.

Some of you people in this site better understand something. Your gossiping about others gets around, I have seen it, it's fucking pathetic.

When someone trusts you and give your their birth name and YOU CHOOSE TO USE THAT like it's your right with YOUR GOSSIPING, trying to break others down , whatever you're fucking game (s) are. 👇🏼

👉🏼 It is pathetic. 👈🏼

If you have a private conversation about with someone on here about others involved in the same space, ANY INFORMATION SHOULD BE KEPT PRIVATE.


The FACT that ppl that ppl even do things like this, you shouldn't even be involved in BDSM where the base, the foundation are Honesty, Trust, Respect.


That's ALL.

Edit:
I believe that someone told someone else some BS about me, not even true but IDGAF. SEE I could tell by how that person whom I was discussed with acted, the funny thing is I didn't know anything about them, bc I would said have at it.


So now I don't discuss personal things w rando strangers, not that I ever did, just general things. Doms when you contact a sub you don't know, they aren't YOUR sub, PERIOD. You don't tell them how to answer a question, you don't make demands on their time, and for those that like to come and go, well, I'm going to respond in the same manner. I'm not anyone's entertainment until I agree to be. Let me say this, I have experienced the personalities of quite a few around here. No, you wouldn't know that because I handle things my own way.

I am different than Twinkle (God made us all different) But reading this type of thing pissed me off.

I've seen some ppl on here writing things about me. I've also been the recipient of some directly in front of me in a thread saying such utter BS, I asked the OP their take, as I thought, it was nonsense.

Ppl should learn to ask questions before condemning or talking shit to ppl.


Don't share personal information with ppl w/o permission.

I'mME • Dec 17, 2024

@Max

If she gave her name to someone she was speaking with and they have shared it w/ someone else well then both those parties, KNOW.

That's my take, that she gave her name to someone who now in their stupidness feels okay w giving it to someone else.

I could be wrong

I'mME • Dec 17, 2024

It's more than that, Twinkle.

There is something WRONG with them, I see it as a menacing act along with a Fuck You.

And the other site needs to remove the post and then.

Twinkle,

I'm sorry that someone has done you this way.

If I can think of something to help you, I will let you know.
Such fucking BS from supposd adults.

❤️

TwinkleEyes • Jan 3, 2025

@I'mME Yes, one used it on purpose to punish me because I called them out in a group. After 2 days of letting them know I didn't feel safe with them and didn't trust them. It's not about familiarity when I tell them for days or weeks I don't feel safe or trust them. And would like them to take my name out of a group. It's about taking deliberate actions to gas light me.

I blocked them all. DollMaker is right these people must be blocked out of my life. Which I did everywhere I could think of. May they both have courage in the future to be more than this. Because this kind of behavior is how build-a-bear act in the BDSM community. It's beyond disrespectful to me. It shows their character and that they don't even respect themselves.

To everyone else here, hank you for all the good advice. May you all have a fabulous New Year.

House Talion​(dom male) • Jan 3, 2025

It should be clear to everyone and anyone refaurdlessnof experience, buy NOTHING HAPPENS WITHOUT CONSENT.

TwinkleEyes • Jan 3, 2025

@ Grizzledoldman Sir, I can’t say that I’ve missed you. Given I have daily access to you. I have missed your logical voice here in the forums. Your wisdom has helped me through many things.

@Sir Don I also thank you for being my good friend. As I have not always honored that.

I am thankful for the authentic kinksters I’ve met here. You have taught me a lot. I have been humbled many times and had to go away and work on growing up.

The support many gave me dealing with these 2 asshats has also humbled me. Gives me faith that there still are kinksters who respect boundaries and basic principles in this lifestyle.

LoveandDevotion​(sub female)​{Owned} • Jan 3, 2025

I'm very sorry that's happened to you.

I'mME • Jan 3, 2025

@Grizzledoldkman,
Yep, yepper, yepping.

Bc they need to be shown a lesson, but I suspect at this stage, it wouldn't do any good.