Selfishness cured by chastity

Selfishness cured by chastity

BuddWeaver​(sub male) • Oct 8, 2025

I was, like most men, pretty selfish. I didn't set out to be, I didn't even notice that I was, but nevertheless, I was selfish. There's something about not being in chastity that naturally makes men selfish.

As I approach 100 days straight of being locked up, I remember who I used to be and makes me sick. The new me it's attentive to my wife, I'm obsessed with her pleasure. I have the energy to work 40 hours a week and do all the household chores. I cook, I clean, and I do laundry. After 60 days of being chaste I convinced my wife to quit her job so I can support her fully. We don't have any kids, she has zero responsibilities, and when I treat her like a princess our relationship has never been better.

The strange part is, I still long to be punished. I'm doing everything right, my wife is amazed at my transformation. But still, I have this desire for her to correct me. For me to serve her more. This passion, this lust, it's so fulfilling. I hope she never uncages me.

Miki • Oct 8, 2025

My 2 cents, don't take it personally, but that's just a "little" bit of a sweeping generalization, using your experiences and feelings to speak for "most men", but if being "locked up" works for you, Great!

I have run across more than a few men AND women over my adult years who acted selfishly from time to time and, well, very few of them on either side of the shithouse wall were "selfish" on account of sexual gratification or the lack of it. The selfishness I had seen in people of all shapes and sizes was more based on finances, possessions, good looks, and the very human drive to seek and grab more.

We see it often in those who are gifted with the hot looks and have talents that make them stand out in a crowd. Actors, singers, models, professional jock straps-- Pick 'Em-- it's all the same: All the attention success and stature in the world is never enough. They can become "divas" and as such, each has the potential to become a big pain in the ass to live with or work for.

---------

So... Again, I'm thrilled that you're happy in your chastity journey and that it is resulting in positive results for you but remember, painting your fellow dick-slingers with the "broad brush" ... can merely result in a mess.

But that's only my opinion. Best of luck, Fella!

SubStanChill​(sub male) • Oct 9, 2025

I know what you mean. Although, I don’t think selfish is the correct way to describe, as much as distracted and exhausted. Like me, you probably aren’t a selfish person in general, but when we’re not locked up, we let the distractions and exhaustion excuse us for not paying attention to our spouse’s needs. I put off doing the dishes, feel overwhelmed by the amount of laundry to do, get frustrated with my wife in general, and when I am in the mood, it’s just easier to go take care of it myself when everyone is asleep.

I’m only on Day 8, but man is my energy up. And my attention on her and her needs is just peak. After the first 24 hrs, I really internalized and empathized that my wife really doesn’t feel confident in her appearance since she had our baby in August. And I just hug her a little tighter, kiss her a little firmer, look her in the eye when I say she’s beautiful and the sexiest woman alive. All with just a little more intent.

As for chores, now, rather than getting annoyed that she isn’t good at keeping up with laundry, despite it logistically being a way easier task for her than me, or that she doesn’t rinse her plates before putting them in the dishwasher. I’ve just been doing both chores, all, happily. Now, I’m just able to let go of fairness and logistics, and focus more on pleasing her, doing what I can to ensure she has energy and feels my love and will play with me in exchange.

So, yeah, I 100% agree with what you’re saying, and I think Miki just took the use of the term Selfish harsher than you intended.

Much love, 100 days sounds terrifying and euphoric at the same time. WOW.