Advice for surviving the death of a partner.

SoSoinKS​(dom male) • Oct 25, 2025

I am sorry you have to endure such a loss.

I know how weak and fruitless any words which attempt to beguile you from the grief of a loss are. Cancer stole my wife, one of the greatest unearned blessings of my life, from me several years ago. What l have learned is grief takes its own time outside of our control. Grief is custom-made, it is a private journey which we all take alone.

Let yourself grieve for as long as you need to. No matter how grim it is right now and dark it is at the moment, the darkness clears, you will come into the light again.

Wishing you the strength to sustain you during this difficult time and the healing that soothes both mind and spirit.

Curiousfsub​(sub female) • Oct 26, 2025

I'm so sorry for your loss. How did you/do you deal with the feeling of guilt of exploring this side of you (if you do)?

Some days I wake up and almost feel like I'm cheating on my partner by speaking about what I like and dont like sexually, to people I dont even know.

The long and short of it is, and its take me a year for this to sink in, is that hes not coming back-ever. And he chose to leave me, alone, grieving and heart broken.

Sinity​(dom female) • Oct 28, 2025

My husband and I had a more relaxed relationship where online flirtation and play was fine with us, so I don't share that reservation and guilt.

I do feel the guilt of experiencing new things that he would have enjoyed and will never get to do. I feel survivors guilt every time something joyful happens or I realize I was being happy without thinking about him being gone. It is getting better, slowly, I feel the guilt less the more just go out and do, which is silly because technically I have more that I could feel guilt about.