ivyandtwine(sub female)
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5 years ago •
Nov 8, 2018
First kink club/party
Hi folks!
It's Ivy again, calling on advice for my first get/kink event ? (This is somewhere that has been recommended to me over and over from connections in local munches; done my research, know at least one person going, so in that regard, I'm feeling confident 
Any tips from those with experience? One thing that has been said to me is that depending on where I am in the event, it's just like a normal party. That's all well and good, but I am notttttt a party person. If your next response is " why go, then?" Read on, otherwise go ahead and leave me your tips.... Why go? Because I want to have the opportunity, in a controlled environment, to watch. Not to get myself off but to see what these things look like for real. Then there's the benefit of having people around so that I can ask questions about anything I need to process. What can I say? I've never done anything half assed. Ivy |
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Online now
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CK45(sub female)
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5 years ago •
Nov 9, 2018
Ivy,
Happy you asked the question, I just asked a similar one on here... Hope you don’t mind if I lurk and check out the answers. |
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dollMaker(dom male)
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5 years ago •
Nov 9, 2018
Your guide is the club/dungeon party rules and any dress code they require. Each party will have common rules/format and maybe some that are different. Its vital to fully understand the rules of the venue, be it public, private club or in a home setting. Most professional venues will have staff on hand to help keep visitors safe/comfortable in a general sense and most will have dungeon monitors to watch play and make sure nothing bad happens in that context.
Some are about dressing and fetish and no play, some mix both and some have no dress code and are play focussed. There are differences in culture between countries regarding parties and how they are organised, but as I said above the venue itself will indicate what should be done and not done. Parties are a great way to see different styles of play and activity, and learn, get ideas. Useful links. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Play_party_(BDSM) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXm7D57YtYc http://www.dazeddigital.com/life-culture/article/39260/1/the-essential-guide-to-your-first-time-at-a-fetish-club https://kinkysprinkles.com/2017/01/31/your-first-kink-event/ https://www.xeromag.com/fvbdplayparty.html |
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MasterBear(other butch)
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5 years ago •
Nov 11, 2018
Hello!
I organize play parties once a month. I teach a play Party 101 class. And I've been organizing in my community for 15 years. Just in case you're wondering where this advice is coming from. You don't have to have a reason behind wanting to go to a play Party. Even if you wanted to use it as jack off fodder that's perfectly fine. Rules are simple when your brand new always dress Street legal, be upfront and honest about your experience level, ask for help. Usually, organizers and host houses are very vested in having people comfortable and they tend to go the extra mile for people who are brand new. You may feel very very uncomfortable for the first couple of goes. My suggestion is to keep going at least in the beginning to figure out how you feel about everything Here are some things to think about The rules at every play party or going to be different. ( I usually offer a copy of the rules to newbies if they want to take for the reference during the party) Number to you're going to mess up. Everyone does. Being present is not consent. There will be somebody during your journey who will violate your consent. They will slip up , they will make a mistake, and so will you. |
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ShyDawn(sub female){Taken}
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4 years ago •
Oct 27, 2019
I'm interested in going to a munch and possibly a play party. But I don't think there are any in my area. I am kinda new to everything
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| Miss Anima(dom female) |
4 years ago •
Oct 27, 2019
Look at it as doing research not a party.
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| SirPain(dom male) |
4 years ago •
Oct 27, 2019
Everyone is giving a lot of good "general" advice. Let me fill you in on a couple of things that you really should not do.
Keep your conversations quiet, especially around areas in which a scene is on going. It can be very distracting for both the sub/slave and Dom alike. If you see a scene that you particularly like wait until it is over (this includes Dom/sub time for winding down and adjusting from subspace) to talk to the participants. Remember, some owned subs/slaves may be under speech restrictions so if you want to talk to one of them you may have to receive permission from their Dom. Check ahead of time as to appetizers. Do you need to bring anything other than what you want to drink? Some places ask that you bring something to share with everyone. If blatant nudity bothers you then don't look. One of the places I frequented some years ago allowed nudity in all its forms. Topless, bottomless, or totally nude. There was one guy that from the time he parked his vehicle he was nude (left his clothes in his vehicle). If you're homophobic, clubs are generally not the place for you. You will either meet or see straight, bi, and gay people. If you can't accept their sexual identification then you will probably feel very uncomfortable and will not fit in. In some clubs and personal play places there may be certain rules in place that another club does not have. For instance, almost every venue (public or private) there have been rules against touching genitals. That means no one can insert even a finger into a vagina or rectal area. Then there are those unique clubs that allow a mixture of BDSM and swinging and just about everything in-between. I hope this is a little more insightful. |
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| Debz(sub female){Barnaby} |
4 years ago •
Oct 27, 2019
There seems to be lots of events in America but does anyone know if there are similar events in the UK
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| SirPain(dom male) |
4 years ago •
Oct 27, 2019
@Debz,
I'm sure if you look around and try to find some place that is sponsoring a munch, you will find there are, more than likely, many places that are holding events. Basically, you just have to look. |
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