What's one thing you learned only later to realize it isn't right?

Let's go way back to when we first saw or heard the term B.D.S.M. It doesn't matter if you saw it in a book, magazine, movie, porn, or on the internet.

What is one thing you had been told, taught, learned, or assumed about B.D.S.M/Kink that just isn't true?

We've all grown and have had good, bad, and ugly experiences. But let's see what we've learned and can still learn from each other.

What's one thing you learned only later to realize it isn't right?