Dominant or Master...

Dominant or Master...

Bunnie • Jul 4, 2020

A great question a friend asked me recently during a discussion, had made me curious as to how others would answer...

“What is the difference, to you, between a Dominant, and a Master?”

DapperDom​(dom male) • Jul 4, 2020

I see it in it's simplest terms: A Master is a subset of a Dominant. The former is a title that can have many meanings, and is traditionally paired with slave. The latter is simply a generic term for one side of of power dynamic.

Thinking Naughty​(dom male) • Jul 4, 2020

What @DapperDom said but also it's whatever you agree for yourselves. Look to what other people do for ideas or inspiration but not for constraints.

To me a dom is control, a master is a more extreme version of a more complete ownership. A dominant leads, a master dictates.

Bunnie • Jul 5, 2020

I will share my response also:

It’s a difficult question for me to answer with clarity, but I will try my best.
If I begin with what I believe is the difference between a submissive and a slave...

A submissive will become the best version of themselves for their Dominant. That is enough to feed their need.
A slave will become whatever their Master wants. They need to give everything to feed their need (TPE)...

I believe this helps lead towards what I consider to be a big difference between a Dominant and a Master...

In its most simplistic form, a Dominant wants a submissive to be their best self for both the Dominant’s desires, and the submissive’s best interests. That is enough to feed their need.
A Master wants a slave to become whatever the Master desires... mostly because they want what they want ... but also because they know that it is what makes their slave their best selves. They need to have everything to feed their need (TPE).

Of course, there are always exceptions... and of course, there are always those who like to believe they’re the exception.

Ultimately, in my eyes... in a dynamic sense, it comes down to this...
a Dominant is someone who enjoys power, but not necessarily to the same level of responsibility as a Master... much like a submissive vs a slave.
It is necessary for a submissive to make sacrifices in order to be a slave. It is also necessary for a Dominant to make sacrifices in order to be a Master.

I believe that some people want a deeper responsibility to each other... and are willing to put in the work necessary to achieve that... and others simply don’t... and aren’t willing.
*which, by the way, I’m not saying is wrong. We each have our own rabbit hole... all depths vary*

I think that’s my definition of the difference.

wildGurl​(sub female) • Jul 5, 2020

I agree with the above. Some think there is no difference but in the title, but that would also mean there's no difference between submissive and slave, which I strongly disagree with.

Every dynamic makes their own rules, but for me personally, I know that masters approach me differently than Doms in general. Usually high protocol with an emphasis on ownership and 24/7 slaves.

So, I'd say every master is a dominant but not every dominant is a master just as every slave is a submissive but not every submissive is a slave.

Happy to contribute to the confusion ?

bearfortwinkz​(dom male) • Jul 5, 2020

In the Same way a dog is a type of animal, every dog is an animal but not every animal is a dog, so too masters are dominates but not every doms are masters. Generally a dom is more paired with a sub and might be more aspects of a dynastic for a scene. Whereas masters tend to be more paired with slaves and tends to be more of a 24/7.

A Dom/sub role might end when the scene ends and it becomes more of a typical dating relationship. Whereas typically a true M/s relationship doesn’t end. Like for instance Kyle is my slave. That doesn’t just stop because we’re not in a scene.

skyrich​(dom male)​{rottenbrat} • Jul 5, 2020

Now that's a Bunnie hitting a nail on the head.

As everyone else has said a master is a kind of dom, and a slave is a kind of sub. It's all about the depths of responsibility and commitment taken on by each.

Is it possible for a slave to have a job? Yes, certainly, if it is the wish of the master, and there're plenty of examples of that. 24/7 doesn't mean chained to the house all day. A slave *thinks* for herself. She doesn't just wait to be told what to do. That is merely blind obedience and carries very little, perhaps no, value at all. When she conforms her thinking to be within the will of her master, THAT is when she has internalized her submission to become slavery. And *that* has great value.

On the other hand, he takes on the responsibility for EVERYTHING in the relationship. It's all on his shoulders now. It's his duty to care for her, provide for her, and ultimately to OWN her, mind and body. When he internalizes *that* he becomes the master, for she is his property, his chattel. And he takes care of what is his. He doesn't suffer that she should be neglected, nor abused, nor allow her to suffer the abuse, slings or arrows of the world. He provides for her shelter from the world.

Thus the two are bound together. Not by ropes, nor chains, but by the the bonds of a love that is so deep and has so keen an edge that neither can break free, and the circle is complete.

rottenbrat​(sub female)​{Skyrich} • Jul 5, 2020

Sub/Slave and Dom/Master...... on either side of this dynamic, both sides have an intrensic behavior that has the potential to produce the actions of the other as an expression of the growth in relationship.

A submissive is something you are...... I submit, bend, relent, give, support, lend of myself because it is intrensic in me to do these things for those I love.
Being a slave is something I do in relation to how someone (My chosen master) sees me. Without his presence, willingness, and involvement I am not a slave, I have no master to answer to. I am still the same sub I have always been. I can be a sub without being a slave. I CAN'T be a slave without first being a sub. The slave is the expression/actions of the sub's growth under the care of her Master.
Likewise with a Dom......... he IS a dom, he takes the lead where it's required, observes the needs of those around him, gives structure and direction where it is necessary because these are intrensic to who he is as an individual and a Dom. Being a master is the expressions/actions of the Dom's growth with the care and influence and support of his slave. And again, we find that he can be a Dom without being a master, but he can't be a master without first being a Dom and having the involvement of his sub/slave to grow with.

sir james ladies​(sub female)​{oh yes ple} • Jul 5, 2020

as explained to us a Dom has sub or slaves under his control. a master also has them but he has the added responsibility of teaching other Doms and Dommas in a particular subset of the lifestyle i.e. rope, whip, restraint. and other subjects.

Bunnie • Jul 5, 2020

@ skyrich,

You explained beautifully, how I tend to see it too.