Rant

Rant

MambaBlack​(dom male){Looking} • Jun 14, 2022

I can’t be the only one noticing the clear gap between Doms who are looking for a sub and a subs who are looking for Doms? It’s like ratio is 3:1 on this site. Also another thing. Why is it that subs will have their relationship status as single leading to the assumption that they are looking for a Dom. Only to end up saying they either aren’t looking for one or they already have found one? Wouldn’t it make sense to change your relationship status I mean at least to me that would make sense.

Knightsundere​(sub male) • Jun 14, 2022

All online dating/relationship-related stuff is gonna be male-biased just inherently. If someone's told you they're taken or whatever they're letting you down easy, take it as a compliment that you didn't say anything crazy enough to be told to f off, lol.

Dom Pinnacle​(dom male) • Jun 14, 2022

These are different times. If her profile says single but not looking, it really means she's looking for someone in particular. He checks all her boxes. The chances of her finding him are slim to none because he's a fantasy most times. And most times you have already been disqualified.

They don't want to be bothered by most guys but keep the door open for the fantasy man that will never show up. TV, movies, Disney, and social media are a big part of the problem. Women aren't looking for a good man. They're looking for an impossible man. Not all, but most.

Notely • Jun 14, 2022

Not everyone is for everyone but it’s the getting to know each other can’t force a connection it has to be the same won’t work. People can put so single they just not fully on market for every Tom dick and Harry they are out their tho just they are reserved for right one. Relationship is not the first thing it’s about getting to know each other see if there chemistry and attraction and more. You could like someone but they may not have feelings their has to be two way street or feelings and more for it to work. Love is rare that is true. Being single does mean door is open to all but the right one nothing wrong with that it’s called boundaries and respect they got tired of the games so doing this way is safe same goes for guys they can do it to. Energy is earned not given it had to be exchanged with trust and effect. Things have changed over time but energy has to right the connection
It not going to happen over night. If you get rejection under stand it’s not over everyone had it really life is experience it help you grow. Women don’t wanna guy that comes off looking for a relationship they wanna you to get to know them as person. I will give example women don’t like guy message women in first message (You could be the one , You collared Owned Taken ? Hot body wanna talk , I’m looking for a Sub for long term , You and me think the same , Your for me , Your the women of my dreams , I came a-crossed your profile , hi , hey , You are mine ) These kind of messages people get tired of. Many can be looking but honestly gotta be built like friendship be my peace see we’re it goes there's know rush love comes later. Desperate won’t work forcing won’t work only away will work let things flow. If you rush love can only lead two people getting hurt best not to be so attached this comes with growth , Time , Loving yourself so can love someone else I same respect get return , bond , yin and Yang. Not your fault for not knowing know one’s perfect but this how we grow get better mend the ways. Don’t take it personally if someone not interested take in to
Moderation it was saving you also. Just like a job offer not doors will be one the right door will be saved for you in time. You will go throw a few people. Best kind of love happens when least expect it in the most unexpected way. Celebrate life don’t be to focus on love be the first thing enjoy life , be your love put gratitude in your life and manifest. Let go of this not being able find someone cut the cord forgive bless what is now be at peace see how things change for you.

Solace​(dom male) • Jun 14, 2022

Hello Meech. Your frustrations are valid.

As some have pointed out, this is the world we live in and must adapt to. Some ladies may not have their profile set correctly, or some may be telling you a white lie to say they are not interested in a way they hope will not harm your mindset. For the latter, it would be nice if they felt they could be honest with you, however they don't have control over who is interacting with them or the received reaction.

Thus, it is a smart and defensible response from them. As an initiator of conversations/relationships, you just have to keep trying and adapting your methods. All dating sites have a massively skewed population towards men, so the right net for you is essential. As of just now, I would suggest filling out your profile more, its an essential tool for you, look at others for inspiration if needed.



I would also like to comment on EssenceAmore's reply. I am not contrasting her viewpoint, in fact I strongly agree with the majority of her post.

However, for the ladies reading this please try to understand where Meech is coming from. Men on here and on other sites (Vanilla or no) get rejected a lot. So much so that ladies may not believe or understand the implications of the number. To put small scale to it, a man might be rejected three times a day, for months at simple initiation of conversation. That much rejection most often must be felt to understand how it wears on a persons very bones.

I will disagree with EssenceAmore speaking for all women however. In a section of her response, she details messages ladies don't enjoy receiving. In direct contrast, I have conversed with many women on this site, where that was in line with their preferred message content from the start. Some ladies prefer it, others do not, and the line between is not always obvious. I would site my anecdotal sources on this, but I feel the ladies in question do not deserve nor have they solicited to be quoted.

Richlydefined​(sub female){Gardener} • Jun 14, 2022

As a woman who likely falls somewhat into this category, I can clarify for myself that I am single both in the unmarried sense and that I am not currently attached to a Dominant. I would like to point out that the unmarried bit could be what others (including myself) have associated with the single/taken status area of our profiles. Especially considering the collared tag option that you can have attached to your name. This is how some people can be both single/taken and collared/uncollared simultaneously.

Notely • Jun 14, 2022

I agree said above. Last three in half years of pandemic people been shut in done where I am but most places not. Society told people be alone. We have to embrace conversation how people use go out and meet. My grandmother meet husband when she was working he was the manager he did just come up to say wanna date he slowly got to know her til they started hanging out then turned in to dating. Romance seems be dead but to keep alive put romance in your life but don’t over do it. I meet guy online when turned my profile back on I was not looking but keep the door still open , We message back and forth then started talking on phone for hours I was bit shy to meet right away he encouraged me we did cam and voice also. It took few days before meeting I would just let anyone I can read people well he was safe I allowed him to come pick me up my friend in the park away from my house he brought me a rose he did as nice jester, he took me to nice restaurant I was dressed to the nines we had great connection he wanted me sit same both he took my hand and felt my soul we had soul connection it sparked both are souls I I could see all of him his aura he had most beautiful eyes , he said my eyes so stunning read the universe. He asked for wine wanted me to share it with me he kissed me I wanted more he worked away slowly. As I said let things flow we all do things different everyone In their own universe you do what you want. Good written profile few photo’s can work keep it interesting.

Notely • Jun 14, 2022

Seems as you are looking for long distance online only this can run in to problems it only last for short if person in to the same if someone looking for real can only be real this is why. You can meet people online you could just try virtual game if you want build it more in like real you have keep online still live your life cause you have do like role play but with feelings. Some might do online understand many want real wanna meet in real not forever online cause they wanna real touch and feeling they wanna know gonna be the same. You can meet someone here take to second life date their go out do things have a house. I have seen some do only online virtual they can come on when you can make time. Submissive needs times you getting to know them I know want serious but slowly work your way knoe sun can Just submit can’t just jump in bdsm right away in a relationship it will only lead to both rushing both getting hurt feelings. Court them go out do things on virtual game go dancing , go to beach let the laughter run wild til connection grows more.

Beautiful eyes​(sub female){Taken} • Jun 15, 2022

Hi,

I must admit I am guilty of this recently, however I have put on my profile recently "not looking" for reasons that I have things going on my my personal life. I don't have the time at the moment to give someone the attention I would if my world has not gone a little crazy.

Sometimes shit happens.
I still come on and chat with people but I do believe in honesty up front.

Atila​(sub female) • Jun 15, 2022

Well, to be brutally honest, that could be the way some of them say they are not interested in that particular person. Is it dishonest? Yeah, but at least you skip a bullet. White lies are still lies.

Also, I hadn’t noticed the ratio. Is that official? Because, at least in the chat, it seems balance. And I see a same amount of participation from men and women on blogs.