Stay at home Dom

Miki​(masochist female) • Nov 22, 2020

Dentists are professional sadists... I think of them playing a xylophone except with a harder "hammer" and on teeth rather than the instrument itself.

Taramafor​(sub male) • Nov 27, 2020

Anaesthetic. They dull the pain. A sadist takes pleasure in it.

Bunnie • Nov 27, 2020

“Is a Dom considered a Dom (or Master) if the sub/slave takes care of the household? For instance, the Dom does not work, but the sub/slave works and pays all the bills.”

I think it depends. There’s a very big difference between an active stay-at-home contributor and a leech.
Do you have a D/s dynamic established? Have you both put in the work to establish your exchange? Has he put in the hard work to become the HOH regardless of who is paying the bills? Have you put in the hard work to understand that pleasing him may not always be sunshine and rainbows? It can be a fine line and yet it can also be quite obvious... so much of it depends on the foundation you have created together.

“Is he still Dominant in other ways besides working? How does he/she keep their respect?”

I think I understand what you’re saying and asking here. I too struggle with seeing some behaviours as Dominant and respecting them... as does everyone. Respect has so many depths and layers to it. Overall respect I think is the foundational one. Yet it’s all the little bits and pieces that add or subtract to that. In establishing the foundation I think it’s behaviours and characteristics that help build that. All of which ultimately leads to trust. Do you trust that he has your best interests at heart, or do you believe that he’s using you? Do you trust in his abilities to lead you both, regardless of whether he fits a specific stereotype or not? Perhaps this is a great opportunity to face stereotypes you may not have realised you had... or perhaps this is a step closer to discovering what it is you actually truly want in your relationships.
Either way, this is definitely a discussion that needs to be had between you both.

TalentedOptimist​(dom male){open} • Nov 28, 2020

Heavily injured on my last deployment. Upon coming home. My partner was still working her civilian job while I struggled to even make to to my medical appointments on time.

I cook, clean, watch the dog etc. We have joked about me being a stay at home husband type of dude.

If you have a partner and this situation hasn't been meted out, then you should start. Life is not going to allow both of you to forever be stable in your roles, finances, and abilities. There will be times when you have to compromise, communicate and cover for each other.

SoulSearcher​(switch female) • Jan 14, 2021

Thank you for your response. Thank you for your service. This is not my situation as I am currently single. My friends Dom lost his job due to COVID and he was feeling less of a Dom because of it. It sparked my curiosity so I wanted others perspectives. I agree with what you have said as well as others with similar responses.

House Talion​(dom male) • Jan 14, 2021

I used to think itd be possible to run a house for wayward slaves. Theyd work to support the home while I ran the house and them. It's actually a pretty sound idea and theres a lot of slave out there that were interested in this idea and the biggest problem isnt finding the first few residents that have the funds to purchase even a fixer-upper with my wife and I in the suit spot of a 3 floor home with finished basement, its having my wife being ok with my access to the use of more than just her for sex

Miki​(masochist female) • Jan 14, 2021

Tell me about it! I hate going to the fucking dentist!