Ahem
Not stupid (btw, stoopid isn't a good example) in regards to what exactly?
Quote: You really should not
I must point out that this violates choice itself. It's speaking/deciding for others.
As for how friendly people are, yes some people can warm up quickly. But how you react/respond to that is on you. You can either choose to be posative or you can choose to be negative.
Quote: Him- Hii.
Me- ::Hugs Eeyore, hides face, shy:: Hiii icon_smile.gif
Him- You looking for a male dom.
Me- ::crosses arms, pouts, huffs:: I am a little, not a sub. ::rolls eyes::
Him - ? what sorry that does not make sense.
Me- ::tilts head:: Then we have no reason to talk further, I am not for you, you are not for me icon_smile.gif
I'm going to make this my main focus.
You're clearly uncertain about things (um. Uh. etc). You're clearly the shy type. But this isn't on others. It's on you. What IS on others is how good (or bad) they are at presenting options and making you aware of the sitautions you're in. However, people aren't mind readers. And you did act like one as if you know what's in the heads of others (when you claimed they don't know). How do you know what others know or not? I highly doubt you asked. Did you?
I realise this is likely overwhelming to you. But I really must stress that assuming is the biggest mistake you can make. Remember, it's about understadning. And misunderstandings happen too often. Inaccurately. Just making that clear.
I also point out doms do have littles. And that littles can be subs. Though the two won't always go hand in hand. Maybe instead of fixating on the "dom" part, instead mention something like "Action and reaction". How you can do things together. WHAT is being controlled has to be discussed (and sub or not events DO have to be controlled).
I also point out that people that assume the worst at first can be proven wrong after communication. based on what you presented it looks like you did not try to understand them enough. Nor did they with you. However you're the one that "quickly gave up" so to speak. In regards to the text you provided. I probably would too in that situation. If only because they can't seem to hold a conversation.
Keep in mind I'm only addressing the situations I mention. Nothing more, nothing less. I'm looking at this as objectively as possible. I think too many assumptions were made in all honesty. What if what you see is nothing more then your own fear?
As for "adult", meh, screw labels. Think of "context" instead. X situation. How to address it. etc. A lot of adults fail to do this properly. It's important to be as aware of the situation as possible. So that the people involved are fully aware of the choices they make in it. Doing it "quickly and smoothly" is the trick (corrections). Personally, as a sub I'm good at doing this. And can dom. This also means I know how to "play". A good sub or little or whatever will "play along". As will a good dom/daddy. Hopefully that puts things into perspective for you.
Beyond that it's a matter of reassurance. But it's a good tihng for a sub/little to assure a dom as much as a dom assures a sub/little. Make it about them so they make it about you. You get the idea.