Not wanting to share my dom

I'mME • Jul 13, 2023

LordofPain56

I was thinking slong those lines myself.

House Talion​(dom male) • Jul 13, 2023

For what u can see the inclusion of any other with you, him, or both had all been based kn what he wants and nothing to do with what you want as you've simply been trying to please your Dom while he changes things ever so slightly very slowly.
Is he worth changing your morrals for? You submit to him, but NOTHING HAPPENS WITHOUT YOUR CONSENT.
It may get to the point that you regret not speaking up.
It's never wrong to express your opinion or to not give your consent to your Dom.
Yes it's hard to find decent ppl in any kind of relationship/ dynamic, but he's still just your dom- NOT your Master.

I'mME • Jul 13, 2023

House Talion,

*but he's still just your dom- NOT your Master.*

This statement seems to suggest that his behavior would be acceptable if he was a Master.
Is that what you were trying to convey?

FunCouple{.-Couple-.} • Jul 14, 2023

There is the Power Paradox….

He has the control BUT you have the Power (to say Yes or No).
It can be that simple, except emotions are involved of course.

Sit down, have ‘that’ chat…..
What do you want.
What does he want.

Find a compromise YOU are HAPPY with.
If not, you have to decide to stay or go.

Both sides of the coin have the right to be happy.

I'mME • Jul 14, 2023

FunCouple,
He was monogamous when they got together. They have talked, it seems he has made a decision, it doesn't matter how she feels.

FunCouple{.-Couple-.} • Jul 14, 2023

New Sub Slut ….. “Is it wrong if me not wanting to share him in a situation where I am not involved?”

My answer …. It’s not wrong of you not wanting to share him

Have as many talks as you want.
Then you decide for yourself what you want to do with the dynamic based on how you feel.

FC

Miki​(masochist female) • Jul 15, 2023

Quote abbreviated for focus:

That's what I and others on this thread were getting at. Have that talk Have as many as you want.

Unless this character concedes that the relationship was founded upon monogamy and he is out of line, he can move his ass along and get in line... for a new sub, and be clear with that prospective sub that he likes to run around and explore a variety of special places with his hammer, and wants that sub to be the life of the next sausage party he wants to throw. Otherwise it's a lather-rinse-and-repeat project.

Again, there is absolutely nothing wrong with dudes who are wired that way, and there are subs or kinksters (as in yours truly) who love being shared with friends and wants no commitment. I seldom got boffed more than once in a given week by the same dick. But That's Just Me.

But this is about you and what your hopes and expectations were at the outset of your relationship.

-------------------------------------------------

If, on the other hand, he realizes he screwed the pooch on this decision and reinvests himself in what was agreed upon, then there's hope...

I may sound cynical and that's strange because never having been in a committed or semi-committed relationship, I was never "hurt"-- but I empathize well.

Anyway, this is how the guy is wired and for him to make himself to reign in his wayward weiner -- time and tide will wear down his resolve and he'll either leave on his own, or start sneaking around to No-Tell Motels, or any similarly low-lighting flea-bag lodging places.

The kicker is, the longer the relationship continues when either or both parties are faking it in hopes of making it--- the sting of a breakup gets progressively worse.

M

Notely • Jul 15, 2023

Pack your things and exit gracefully , But if its your house throw his things to the curve change the locks do not share accounts with them end them now. Keep your mind and speak up for yourself set boundaries never settle for anything less. Wait for him to get home confront him hit with a frying on the wall but not enough to hurt burn somthing make looks like his make him think what he has is worth losing you. Some do not understand love til they burned themself. Think like house wife but a independent women your not a doormat.

First sign of them not being on the same page, not in your vibration not making you feel safe, time to exit.
If you're not into being shared or them seeing others they should have left you alone because this is not a match but sees you as a very submissive person but using it as their own game to keep you around for company comfort and leave you at home this is so wrong you have feelings. Do a background check on this guy. His energy is not right, you need to get out there.


It's a trap that is not love, it's more of a game they are playing for their own needs and fetish not being open and honest with you, not respecting you as a partner all together. Only a few things Women ask for to feel safe and protected. It takes a rare one to value a Woman. a Woman is worth more than rubies you gotta value the one you have at home it's Up to the Dom/Head Of Household to show it not just say it but with blue prints. Without communication there is no relationship. Without respect there is no love. Without trust there’s no reason to continue.

Monogamous Relationship is one for one committed to each other only in partnership as a household unit of love and trust and honesty with openness and agreeing on things. Huge responsibility in Monogamous they have to be out the frat party life it takes to grow as a person to love them self and respect themself to love another to make room for his lady. It's his job to be Head of HouseHold to lead and protect and respect his partner and cherish her at all cost but disciplined out of love. She will respect him if she values giving it back; it takes two to tango. In D/s also its a bond with love with trust being open and honest with each other.

“Whatever you give a woman, she will make it greater. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby.. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit!”

Sex is not the first thing that needs to be emotionally invested before getting hooked showing effect with blue prints to earn a heart with love. Love has to be on a deep level but with a feeling , soul connection , on the same page vibration , communication , chemistry . built with trust and openness with love being a team . Taking it slow, allow it to flow this love when the time is right let it be. If they they only after sex always thier no romance or feeling they only for their feelings it's a trap of manipulation for their sex addiction. He goes see others he can be using this try to find someone else leave you high and dry he hiding not letting you meet them this not trust at all.


You both talked about it, you not into being shared or them seeing others. Keep your mind Speak up for your feelings, put your foot down, tell them how you feel that you're not liking this that you both talked about this. If he can't respect your feelings or care then time to pack your or through his ass to the curve put yourself first because once trust is broken can never be again.


But being in partnership if he thinks only about one he is wrong. Even if a couple agrees to share the Wife has a say in everything and gets to meet these both should meet in a public place to see if they are safe and sane and std free everything is in the open nothing hidden. But if he made you do things in the beginning making you see others for his pleasure you were not into this it's a red flag from the start. Does not matter but he did not even do background check on these guys they all should be tested but still good Dom would never force this crap only guy that acts a pimp this is disrespectful. He seems to act like a young boy not even grown.


He is trapping you in this game and you're so much more than this. If he can't value the one he already has at home he does deserve any woman to let him keep his trash life but he is lying to you about these others for his lust and needs no love there. He hides playing games not being honest with you this not how grown man acts this like a married man hiding from his wife. If you are not married then you can exit this Relationship. Even if you are married you can file for divorce right away but when they are not around don't tell them. Give them a chance at first you need a answer But first tell them I am your partner and we are in Monogamous D/s Relationship But if you can't be open and honest with or even have communication them I am done but give a chance to see if he change or want to help get counselling he should apologize to you. If he is not willing to get help or change or he tries to change the subject then you know what you need to do.

Save yourself and forget about talking to him if you try to sign. He does not care to pack your stuff and get out when he is not around to go somewhere safe. Only way to get out of the trap could get worse: try not to let you leave and want you to feel sorry for them, don't put your foot down.

Notely • Jul 15, 2023

Put yourself first be sexy for your secure your life love yourself date yourself put your value way higher. Not all connection will be the same not everyone is for you it takes someone to make you feel safe be more then headache they need to earn your heart and trust before anything.

Here is a little somtrhing
Beyoncé - Why Don't You Love Me
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QczgvUDskk0

Blu Cantrell - Hit 'Em Up Style (Oops!)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LMOKlXfXn50
M People - Moving on Up
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zkHOVJINRD8
Meghan Trainor - NO
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cMTAUr3Nm6I

Multifemale | Confident
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wkWkoaK5g50
multifemale | woman like
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gte2ELTQAoo
Multifemale | Badass Woman
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iolFjgbBOPs
Hailee Steinfeld - Love Myself
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bMpFmHSgC4Q

DeepEmbrace​(dom female) • Jul 16, 2023

No, you are not wrong. You two are NOT compatible. He is also not respecting your boundaries. And he is straight up cheating on you. Cut your losses and end it. You can find someone better than this piece of shit that you're with. This situation will not get better; it will get worse.