lizh(sub female)
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3 years ago •
Mar 9, 2021
Hi
3 years ago •
Mar 9, 2021
I'm glad I find this place today!
How to start introduce myself? I'm a women that gone trough difficult times in my life. When I was 19 years old, I got seriously ill. It turned out that the reason for it was because I was sexually abused as a child , and I have blocked that memory out of my head. It worked until I turned 19. I was "gone", told my mom I was "dead" and I didn't even recognize my mom. "Who are you coming here and crying?" I asked her. It took years until I was back, and the memory's also.
I came to a treatment home and started my psycho therapy. I fell in love to my psychotherapist. I was in therapy for my half life. Not only though. I also study and such.
I have educated myself, got a job, married, got two kids, divorced (since over 10 years back) and haven't been in any relationship since than. My therapist thought he could be my "friend" messaged me in the middle of the night , all days on a week. It was not professional and when he started his own practice and took black money from me- I reported him- we ended everything on message on the phone. It turned out being very .. how to put this? Not in a good way.
Last summer I did go in to a porn site got a lot of friends , but ended my account because I felt really ashamed. I kept contact with 2 . One from France and one from Argentina who I talked football with.
The other, from France, said he "owned me" and trained me to be his "slave". He totally control me. Anyway, however, he is now gone ( I don't know for how long, he always find me though I tried to escape I give up).
And today I search porn again... But it didn't say me anything . I googled "dominant/slave" and I find this "The Cage".
I talked already on my first day here to some of you , and I was thinking I wanted to say hello. Saying something about myself.
I didn't knew I was going to tell you all this, but I did. We only live once. When we look at the earth, from the heaven, we are as little as ants . Everyone do things we can feel ashamed over. And with little luck , we been able to do it again...
Thanks for reading this long!
Take care of yourself!
Peace and everything good.
M
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