Remlud wrote:
Hello all you Ls and Ms. I'm so sorry if this isn't where I should post it but I didn't want just anyone to answer, I wanted your answers. I can also delete it if I am invading your new fun space
I wanted to ask, how did you know that you were a L/M? I am a sub, but the reasons I have come down this path is because my life is so stressful. I have really high anxiety , mood swings, self doubt, etc. I was looking for a Dom to show me how to better manage myself and explore sexually as well. After being on this site, I realized, almost immediately that I specifically wanted a Daddy Dom, not just a Dom.
Short back story, no childhood, lots of trauma, grew up way too soon.
My questions...
1. How did you know you were a L/M?
2. Do you think exploring being a L/M might help with the stress of life and my responsibilities because what 4 year old thinks of all the things that I do?
3. If I am already established as NOT a L/M, how would I tell/ask my Daddy Dom that this is something that I would want to explore?
Thank you for literally ANY advice, you wonderfully sparkly collection of cute souls
I've always felt kiddy and child like excitement when things happened or I saw things for the first time. These things often made me feel childish and saw others look at me as if to say "Act your age" but it was not something that I could control as it felt part of me. When becoming free of an abusive marriage and learning more of BDSM four years ago I just gradually allowed my little side to come out more and more in order to let the adult me heal more.
After a while it seemed the little me was the more natural me as it allowed me to be carefree, stress free and my anxiety, depression, etc slowly crept away. Now when I need that break from adulting I turn to little things.
I don't think its something that you have to tell but maybe more show him the little/middle you inside. My feelings are that allowing that side of you to come out naturally, lets the relationship shift to that position. If you talk about it too much it feels directed and contrived. That's not to say not to talk about boundaries and rules but don't talk about how your little will be. If that makes sense.
And of course all of this is only my opinon.