Femdom ads; the inevitable money demand.

jcalzonenyc • Nov 29, 2021

What’s the difference between a dominant woman demanding remuneration for her services ( relationship, intimacy, conversation, physical contact ) and pay for play prostitution?
Call it what you wish. She’s a whore.
It’s got nothing to do with affirming genuine interest and sincerity. I’m all for paying for an airline flight and hotel for a meet and greet, but that’s where it ends.

At least with a date, a necessary ritual of singles where there’s a mutually understood give an take without a promise of sex, it’s a one time price.
Nobody would stay with a woman who ( no pun intended) comes with a bill.

latinothickdick • Nov 29, 2021

This is extremely common on dating and BDSM websites in general.

Usually either:
- individual scammer
- catfish farm (multiple scammers in a call center type set up)
- straight up bots

It’s completely fucked to the point where some previously relatively normal sites are overrun by bots. Even the pornhub comment sections are getting bad.

Steellover​(sub male) • Nov 30, 2021

This is really a question specifically for Ms. Fyglia Wicked: With all due respect, you have mentioned "Cringe" a couple different times in more than one thread regarding men identifying as submissive.

I don't mean to troll, or push buttons, and I want to give people the benefit of the doubt here. I think a lot of us, perhaps unintentionally, engage in "kink shaming" without ever intending to, or even realizing that is what we are doing. I myself have been called out on it before, and having learned, felt bad about it afterwards.

So, with that said, can you clarify what it is, specifically, you find "Cringeworthy" about male submissives, specifically what you found so distasteful about some of their posts on here? If nothing else, it might serve as a blunt but useful learning tool to otherwise well-intentioned male subs who may be new to the scene and may not realize what they are doing wrong. If you are not into male submissives, then that is your right- as not everybody is.

Regarding financial dommes and gold diggers/scammers, as that was the original context for the discussion, there is an important difference; one of them is by mutual consent and the other is not. I think most would agree that non-consensual activity is pretty much universally frowed upon here.

yourbootsownme​(sub male) • Nov 30, 2021

Of course not every message that mentions money is a full-on scam. There ARE people who engage in such things by preference as both Dommes and subs (although I believe FD is against the rules here and elsewhere for legal reasons) and of course there's the sect of the world which is full-on "pay to play."

Lately the scam messages I've received must have been so over-the-top that the accounts are deleted before I even get a chance to read them and roll my eyes.

There's no point in putting anything in your profile like "I'm not giving you money" or "I don't pay to play" because they don't read the profiles anyway.

It's MUCH more difficult to meet someone online; you'd be better served going to local group munches and the affiliated events.

Still, I look at it this way: it may be frustrating that I waste time in a conversation with someone only to have money come up unexpectedly, but it's really no different than spending time talking up someone in person (in the vanilla world) only to discover they're attached/involved/married/unavailable. It's part of the process.

As a general rule: remember that if someone approaches you out of the blue online and can't say how they found you or why they chose to message you in particular, they're probably a waste of time. And if a supposed dominant messages you and asks "are you ready to obey me in all things" or mentions owning you or collaring you in the first message, just block tem and keep going.