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Being born as a Dominant vs Becoming a Dominant, over time, with help

Sasa​(dom female)
4 years ago • May 25, 2020
Sasa​(dom female) • May 25, 2020
Addition: “Born out of submission” is a romantic idea of a hen/ egg problem you created. 😄
DeviousMaster​(dom male)
4 years ago • May 25, 2020
DeviousMaster​(dom male) • May 25, 2020
The mind was/is tricky, words were 'invented' by the tricky mind in order for the mind to become trickier, mind became bamboozled. Or feelings are tricky and have created the mind...who knows!? icon_smile.gif
Sasa​(dom female)
4 years ago • May 25, 2020
Sasa​(dom female) • May 25, 2020
I guess it could get tricky when something becomes a substitute religion... everything else is simple. Nice topic, anyway. Thanx
once orchid{None}
3 years ago • Jan 11, 2021
once orchid{None} • Jan 11, 2021
tallslenderguy wrote:
" it really comes down to those who were genuinely born with the innate sense of self yet understand they only truly become a Dominant once submission is given, are born"

Wow, i love this explanation, that Dominance is born out of submission.



Thank you icon_smile.gif
TheAnt​(dom male)
3 years ago • Jan 11, 2021
TheAnt​(dom male) • Jan 11, 2021
Wow.. I did not read all the replies but I got the general gist, I think on what the mindset is. And with that I have to disagree.
As a young man I knew my place in this BDSM world. My personality has ALWAYS been of one that takes charge in any situation and it made me fairly successful in the military albeit I did have to clench my teeth and follow someone else lead when they were in charge.
I will agree that not all who call themselves Doms are born that way nor do I got an instance believe that they are actually Doms in the true sense of the word and instead there are a lot of perpetrators.
I cannot agree with the prevailing thought that all Doms expect anyone that calls themselves a sub must kneel or bow at the feet of all who go by the name of Dom. That’s crap. I as an “Old Guard” know that no sub, except my own, owes me any allegiance or even the barest of acknowledgment but I owe every sub that seeks advice or help that help as long as her Dom approves it OR the sub is in danger. I also owe the community a sharing of knowledge and my opinions (the two can be hard to discern).
Again I do not expect any sub to listen to my advice. It is there for the taking as is my advice for a Dom. I can point out out to you which pedal is the gas and the which is the break, use them as you choose just don’t have me in the car if you choose to mix them up, in other words do not put me in the position of that time honored “I told you so.” I won’t say it, and I will help, but really?
I think that a lot of today’s “newbies” choose to take a view that that Doms learn to be Dominant which is what I gather (maybe in error) from this discussion thread but I am pretty certain that no sub should ever place in a position of trust their mind and body to a person that only thinks they may be a Dom.
I know it and have always known it. I cannot even stand having my pet, who I love dearly, try to push me into feeding her early.
In summary,
Not all those who call themselves Doms are Doms. Not all Doms are born that way. Some Doms are born Doms. Those lifelong Doms are not the ones who are over bearing nor easily convinced otherwise. They have ZERO to prove to anyone outside there dynamic. I spoke up only because I truly believe the thoughts expressed in this chain were based on a flawed interpretation brought on by the presence of these wanna be fake “doms” and the wave of instadoms that we see due to movies and over the top sex sites promoting an unreal perception of the BDSM lifestyle.
Maybe I am wrong. Don’t really care. I know me and that’s good enough.
-DA