At which age did you realize your submission or Dominance?

banditswild • Sep 4, 2020

I have always leaned towards the Dom side in all of my relationships now that I look back on them. It finally hit me as to what I was when I attended my first Dungeon party while living in Europe (although I still did not have a name for it). Most people's first time they are caught off guard with all the different activities, games, and nakedness all around them. A Master approached me and said, "It would please me if I watched you take my slave". I thought it was a joke, or I was being "Punked" (if any of you have seen the show) so I looked over my shoulder to make sure there were no cameras. He realized I was not sure and apprehensive so offered her leash to me. I took it, (in his broken english) he said, "Follow me, I know where to go and I will show you how it's done". He lead us down stairs to where there was an examination table with some restraints at each end of the table. He gave me a crash course in how to restrain her, release her, and her safe word. He stepped around the corner where there was a small room with a one way window that you could not tell was there unless you were shown the room or seen some one walking in or out if it. He wanted to to masturbate as he watched. The moment he left, I looked down at her laying there on the table, naked, nice full breast leaning over the to each side of her body, with her legs held open from the restraints. She had a little fur on her vagina to just cover it ever so slightly but you could see her flower, turned outward, with her nectar glistening in the low light. I was right at HOME and everything else came very natural to me. I was 28.

tohruhonda​(sub female) • Sep 9, 2020

Definitely my first boyfriend at 14. Gave him a list of all of my clothing (unprompted) because I wanted him to choose what I wore. If he didn’t it hurt my feelings and I tried to annoy him to the point of anger because he had a habit of pinching my lower lip and telling me to “rethink my attitude.” I’d have tunnel-vision for several minutes before I could move on. Didn’t know what it meant until years later.

ASensualDom • Sep 9, 2020

Almost 22 years of age, wrote about it in a blog post.

Ticket Shirt slave​(masochist male){male slave} • Sep 11, 2020

I was about 9 years old when I started to daydream about being tied up and whipped. What prompted these daydreams was some magazines I found in an old abandoned house in my neighborhood. I discovered masturbation at this age and I frequently went into this old abandoned house to be alone so I could masturbate. I have a Woman's Notched Collar and Pocket "Shirt" Fetish which is described in my profile. I call the Shirt a "Ticket Shirt." I would go into the house, take off all of my clothes, put my Ticket Shirt on and masturbate.

Sometimes, when I was in this abandoned house, I would explore the house wearing nothing but my Ticket Shirt and shoes. One day, while exploring the house wearing nothing but my Ticket Shirt, I found an old trunk which I overlooked on my previous explorations. I opened it up and found several bondage magazines. The magazines showed men and Women in various bondage situations. Many of the photos showed fully clothed Women Dominating naked men who were tied up with rope and the Women were whipping them.

I was immediately fascinated by these photos and I found myself sexually aroused by them! I would look at the photos and masturbate, imagining that it was me, who was tied up and being whipped while wearing my Ticket Shirt! From that time on, I went to the old abandoned house whenever I could. I would get out the magazines I found, strip off my clothes and put my Ticket Shirt on. I would look at my favorite photos which were of Women Dominating men and whipping them. As I looked at the photos, I would masturbate, imagining it was me all tied up and wearing my Ticket Shirt and being whipped by a fully clothed Woman! I did this for the next two years off and on until we moved away!

So, it was at 9 years old that I found out that I was not only submissive, but that I was a Masochist! Later on in life, my fantasies came true! I had experiences with several Women who Dominated and whipped me. The Women always allowed to wear a Ticket Shirt while they Dominated me and whipped me. Presently, I have a Mistress and I enjoy being Her slave. She wears Ticket Shirts and is fully clothed while She Dominates me and whips me! My profile is available to view for anyone who is interested.

Zerospace​(dom male){Amalthea} • Sep 11, 2020

My proclivities for dominance stem from my personality and have always been with me. I'm of the architect and sage archetypes and my personality screams for control, either because I am thinking 3 steps ahead of other people or because I don't trust them to act in a rational manner. So having control and being dominant was just my default. A few ill-gotten moments of power going to my head in my youth taught me about the misuse and corruption of political power, and I guess I conflated all forms of power and avoided all forms of power for years. Only recently, and with the help of my wife, am I parsing out the various forms of power and seeing dominance for its own pleasure.

But also, my sexual fantasies often involve some form of mental manipulation and control over the other. That's been a constant for me since my first crushes.

AlexLeeSadist​(dom male) • Sep 11, 2020

I've had Dominant desires for as long as I've thought about sex. 10, 11 maybe? Somewhere in there.

allstar • Sep 15, 2020

When I was 10 I saw a bdsm scene in a mainstream movie and was intrigued. However, I am not sure when exactly I have realized my submission. Probably in my early 20's.

dirmn​(dom male) • Sep 16, 2020

I'm always amazed at those of you who knew so early, built up protective layers to hide parts of you, and then were later able to peel them back and chase your dream.

I wasn't really aware of this world (or maybe that it could apply to me) until my early twenties. I was always aware of my confidence though, from a very early age. I remember not being able to understand the effects of social pressures my friends were feeling. It served me pretty well, frankly, but I didn't really consider what iceberg it might be the tip of until much later.

Foryoutouse​(sub male) • Sep 16, 2020

When I was a child, watching (what would later to be known as WWF) wrestling, I ALWAYS wanted to be the guy that was being "slammed" around, or under the other guy, pounding the mat, getting bent into a pretzel with the other guy on top.............I ALWAYS wanted to be the Underdog getting used and abused.
I didn't have my first Sado -Masoc experience until about 1 yr ago (I'm 50 now), and I LOVED/hated it!!!
The feelings of butterflies from fear, excitement, of not knowing what His "sick" mind was going to put me through next was an absolute..........OMG, I don't even know how to explain the feelings!!!
If it wasn't for me needing a little "downtime" to "heal" or rest, I would easily want to try to be a "live-in".
(Although He has offered a "trial run" with a 48 hour w/end stay in His home. Hasn't happened yet, I am married to a (wonderful) Vanilla Lady, and I have no sex at home due to early ED, so our relationship is .....well, You get the picture.)
So, after a lot of soul searching, and self-analysis, I found that I was actually a SUBmissive/Masochist in my Childhood years, but just didn't know there is a place in the world for a person "like" me.
I had not many/not a few , but some Bi-sexual partners, and one M/F married DOM/Domme(switch) partners, from my 20's on, and was always a BOTTOM, and always tried to coax my partner(s) into being a little more rough, demanding, strict with me, but never found anyone to actually get to the level I was hoping for. Even if they described themselves, or thought themselves to be "DOMinent", I found that they thought a slap or two on the ass while fucking me was "DOM" , but they didn't really know, or want to appease the SUBmissive in me.
It wasn't until I started looking online for BDSM, D/s, S/m, sites did I find a Man who was "into" or understood what I was truly looking for. I have wished so many times that the InterWeb had been around when I was in my 20's...............but, on the other hand........how much of a Pain Slut would I have turned into, LOL.

SIRMASON​(dom male) • Sep 17, 2020

i figured out i was a DOM at 14 i'm now 43 i was dating this girl and she wanted me to always spank her when she did bad things and i noticed i always got aroused so from that time forward i became a DOM and never looked back best thing i ever did in my life