Starlight82(other female)
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6 years ago •
Oct 29, 2018
Transition from online to RL
Hi all
I have done online for approx a year and i feel it was a great base for me to safely explore elements of a D/s relationship but I am now starting to try and venture out into the real world to find a physical partner. I'm wondering if there is any advice on taking this step. Obviously I am applying the same kind of things i learnt online. As most meetings for me still start in a chat room as i find this less confronting. So the usual no pictures, taking our time to chat and i ignore anyone rude or forceful of my submission. And obviously first meets to be in a public place once i am comfortable to do so. But is it natural for some people to still be a little guarded? I have someone i am talking with who has been respectful so far. We have talked about our kinks and relationship expectations and experience but i find him gaurded on telling me too much about himself. It is early days and i understand trust must be built. I just dont wish to be hurt emotionally or physically. So any advise on the transition process would be appreciated. Thanks Star |
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Online now
FabSeverus(dom male)
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6 years ago •
Oct 29, 2018
Usually a Dom would be more open during the face to face meeting and assess the sub credentials. After all he’s got the same amount of risk than you at this point.
And you could also judge by yourself with some guts and observation about himself. Like physical appearance, clothes taste, perfume, shoes, mannerism, eye contact, hands posture etc... |
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MasterBear(other butch)
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6 years ago •
Oct 30, 2018
It is absolutely natural for people to feel a little guarded when they're headed into a new environment.
I'll give you a funny story. When my love and I move to New Mexico we already had three years experience. But this is a whole new environment and I had no idea what I was going to be running into. I remember going to our very first Munch in New Mexico and being completely on guard and stiff as a board unable to talk to anybody. I had my Sirius get away from me Vibes going on period then after the month I turned my love and I said we are never going back. We ended up spending the next 14 years of our lives in that group. I am eternally grateful that my love is much better at putting people at ease then I am. |
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Starlight82(other female)
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6 years ago •
Oct 30, 2018
FabSeverus wrote: After all he’s got the same amount of risk than you at this point...
Thank you FabSeverus this is a very good point. And one that is often forgotten. He is quote open about many other things so i must respect his desire for privacy until he is ready to tell me more. Once he trusts me and i have proven im not a fake. Changing from fantasy to reality is a daunting thought but also an exciting one  i think time is the key.
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