Bringing d/s into vanilla settings

Bringing d/s into vanilla settings

Ethos​(dom male) • Mar 2, 2017

I just wanted to hear people's thoughts on how they handle there situations in vanilla settings.

Do you have certain signs that the other recognises, do u wear jiggle balls or remote toys , how do u place ur selves while u sit for dinner in a restaurant etc thought it would be interesting to hear from different people n how it varies between them.

Villanelle​(staff) • Mar 2, 2017

Oh one of my fav topics - thanks Colin!

A piece of jewellery is an obvious one but effective - perhaps even something so simple as a string around an ankle or wrist. I prefer hidden actually. Male subs wearing female undies - the lacier the better! Cock cages of course! And you can always write on them with a sharpie.

As far as behaviours, yes ordering at restaurants, making them walk behind you or perhaps even holding them in a certain way. I find holding my sub by his wrist very powerful and erotic. It's the small things, isn't it? And I do love the little secrets, talismans, and symbols between lovers.

Ethos​(dom male) • Mar 2, 2017

Yes the subtle things r my favourite too Eva. I'm not one to broadcast what's going on n find the little things exciting and a great build up to when u get home. I love the remote toys and using them gradually as the night goes on building to something intense. Pearl thong on my sub maybe .

public

susan 146 • Mar 5, 2017

taking your sub out to dinner with a supp in and a butt plug also a full bladder andcwatching her squirm then you giving permission for hervto go. private but ohh so exciting and invasive

Villanelle​(staff) • Mar 6, 2017

@susan 146 - I am also a fan of insertables and ...shall we call it "bathroom control" (both of which of course have to be explored with common sense and respect for health and safety of course). But they are subtle ways to have a bit of public fun.

SirLadyBear​(sadist femme) • Mar 21, 2017

I actually presented on this at last year's Geeky Kink Event. there are many things you can do in public that are still private like speech restrictions, choosing the bottom's clothing, requesting a certain form of address and even using other kinks as tools ( like hypnosis, dirty talk (whispered in ears) and under clothes bondage) to create different emotions and the feeling of exposure with out actually drawing the vanilla into the scene.

I'll look for my notes and post them if anyone is interested.

Eagertolearn​(switch male) • Mar 21, 2017

I would be very interested in reading those notes SirLadyBear

Villanelle​(staff) • Mar 21, 2017

Me too!

DrWakko • Mar 21, 2017

I'm surprised I haven't seen anyone mention vibrating panties where the Dom/me has the remote. Also vampire bras can be fun.

SirLadyBear​(sadist femme) • Mar 21, 2017

I'll look for my notes when I get home and type them up (I'm old school despite being young so I hand write absolutely everything )