Online now


↑ ↓
2 months ago • Wed 06 Mar 2019 08:49:42 AM IST


MsTaraDactyl • Wed 06 Mar 2019 08:49:42 AM IST
I've been thinking a lot lately about collars.

I've never had more than just a collar for play, but my current partners have mentioned the possibility of a real collar in the future.

How does it work if say your job prohibits excessive jewelry and such? A traditional collar would be a no no where I work. I vaguely remember hearing about formal vs everyday collars once. Is that a real thing? Like an actual collar in private (or when socially acceptable) and a more discreet piece of jewelry other times...

Tell me I'm not making this up.

Do you have more than one collar?
2 months ago • Wed 06 Mar 2019 09:25:23 AM IST
MsTaraDactyl • Wed 06 Mar 2019 09:25:23 AM IST
Thank you MasterBear. I could wear a simple necklace with a meaningful charm. I just wanted to make sure there wasn't some "rule" I'd be breaking if we had more than one collar.
2 months ago • Wed 06 Mar 2019 01:10:29 PM IST
Bunnie • Wed 06 Mar 2019 01:10:29 PM IST
@ MsTaraDactyl,

some links icon_smile.gif ...

Traditional style collars/day collars:

*etsy has heapsssss of options...

*got this one from a recent blog on here...

Some other ideas:
*nipple/labia jewellery can be discreet, and is something a little different...

*piercings are also another option.

The options are only as limited as your imaginations icon_biggrin.gif
    The most loved post in topic
FlipSide1481​(dom male)
2 months ago • Wed 06 Mar 2019 02:06:29 PM IST
FlipSide1481​(dom male) • Wed 06 Mar 2019 02:06:29 PM IST
There is no BDSM police except the ones that you allow.

Do what feels right and natural for you and yours. If people tell you that is not right ask for a citation from the book of Domliness.

For me collars and charms and the way they are worn is very personal. It has alot to do with how "open" you can be in public life.

I hope this helps and is not to snarky... It is meant to be affirming.
Onlinedomguy​(dom male)
2 months ago • Wed 06 Mar 2019 07:35:45 PM IST
Onlinedomguy​(dom male) • Wed 06 Mar 2019 07:35:45 PM IST
There are so many different ways to wear a "collar". In situations where you need to be discreet, find a small item that you could wear that is for him. Could be subtle piece of jewelry or small specific item he has chosen for you. As long as you know you are wearing it for him it likely will suffice. Different people have various views of course, but for me as a Dom knowing a collar is not appropriate all the time, I like small subtle items we are the only ones who know the significance.
Kit Kat​(sub female){Mermaster}
2 months ago • Wed 06 Mar 2019 11:44:04 PM IST
Kit Kat​(sub female){Mermaster} • Wed 06 Mar 2019 11:44:04 PM IST
I have a day collar I NEVER take off. It looks like a simple necklace. I consider it like my engagement collar. I have a posture collar that I wear around the house and use it.. has an o-ring..

Actually I have several posture collars- they seem hard to get a good fit.

And soon I will be getting my actual collar to replace my engagement collar. I'm really into locking and hex screws. Also it wont be removable.. so it will be passable as jewelry.

I've thought about being branded. I am willing.
Master is wary- also said no more tattoos. Piercings.. I do as requested.
SweetSirRendering​(sub female){Silentium❤}
2 months ago • Thu 07 Mar 2019 03:45:21 AM IST
SweetSirRendering​(sub female){Silentium❤} • Thu 07 Mar 2019 03:45:21 AM IST
i am happy for you to be discussing such an exciting and special step in your relationship! i am sure you will all find the perfect option.

We found we were happiest with a certain piercing and a titanium eternity brand bracelet for 24/7 wear. simple necklaces are a great option or even anklets, but i personally prefer the feel and discretion of the bracelet.
Dark Fox​(dom female){Wolfy13}
2 months ago • Thu 07 Mar 2019 08:07:19 AM IST
Dark Fox​(dom female){Wolfy13} • Thu 07 Mar 2019 08:07:19 AM IST
For us, Wolfy simply wears his collar. He absolutely CANNOT wear it st work (strict uniform policies) and for him, he wouldn't anyway as a matter of thinking about other people. And he keeps it off at church, again, with other people in mind. But everywhere else, it's on. As soon as he comes home for the day it goes back on, only coming off to shower or something of that sort where it would ruin the leather.

We both dont really care what others think, as long as it wont hurt us in the process (It would hurt him at work because he could be unfairly treated and demoted, and it would hurt us at church because we do a lot of work and teaching there, we dont want to have that opportunity taken away because of misunderstandings).

Plus, we already have our wedding bands... to me that's about as, "This is mine!" As one can get Haha. People in every type of lifestyle see that and know he is taken, and same goes for me.

However, I think the others giving advice have been pretty spot-on if you're looking for something to wear 24/7 that would fit with work and such. I'm not wearing collars of course but I'm looking to get myself a necklace with a key, as my own symbol of position/relationship status. No one will question it. It's just a necklace to most. I want to get him some sort of more discreet collar to wear in formal situations, like the necklaces or something, so I do think those are good ideas. I'm just struggling cause everything is super girly and, while we dont care about that, the point would be for being more discreet... girly things on a man isnt so Haha.

It's all about what you and your partners want. Necklace, bracelet, anklet, piercings... whatever! Enjoy it and show off that sign of ownership/being owned with pride (if it's meant to be exposed icon_razz.gif)

Good luck and I hope you find what you're looking for soon ^^

(I second Etsy, it's where I think I will get my necklace, and possibly Woofy's formal collar)