Forced bi - is it ethical?

Forced bi - is it ethical?

event horizon{NotLooking} • Jul 29, 2019

I realize this is a rather loaded question. But, I am genuinely asking, because I'm admittedly a bit confused by the premise, and by its potential execution.
Also, I'd like to preface this by saying I am an actual bisexual person, so this isn't any shade to other bi or gay people.

In my head, either the sub/slave in question is some degree of bisexual/pansexual, in which case it's not forcing so much as enabling a desire, or... they're straight, and forcing them to engage in homosexual acts (like only allowing them to touch themselves if they edge to gay porn) is potentially messing with how their brains and sexuality are wired, and causing psychological damage.

I came to this conclusion because, regardless of whether or not they consent to such a thing (and let's be clear -- some subs/slaves do/have/will consent to things just to please their Dominants, even if they don't enjoy those things)... the same kinda thing, but in the other direction, has been used in conversion camps to try to manipulate homosexual people into thinking/acting straight. These methods have been labeled as cruel and damaging, and are not sanctioned by any psychiatric association (at least, not in my country -- I can't vouch for others). It's considered by many, myself included, to be a form of torture.

So.. If it's bad to make gay people touch themselves to straight porn, or otherwise put them into forced heterosexual situations...... how is it okay to force an otherwise straight person to edge to gay porn? Or be sexual with other people of the same gender, when they themselves would not choose such a thing?

There must be something about all this that I'm just not understanding. So I'm hoping someone can maybe fill in the blanks here. Or just tell me I'm right and it's weird, that's also an option.

Thanks in advance, if you have any thoughts to share on this.

Eren123​(sub male) • Jul 29, 2019

My thoughts exactly. I came across so many who wanted me to do forced bi, even from the start. To which I had to decline and was called rude and other names for it.

DrWakko • Jul 29, 2019

There is no such thing as forced bi. As long as consent and the safe word exists in Bdsm you can’t have “forced” anything. Even in CNC there are still safe words to stop the scene.

I believe forced bi exists for those who aren’t out to themselves and are battling their sexuality. The forced bi allows them to act out same sex acts but still allows them to identify as straight since the act was forced on them.

DW

dollMaker​(dom male) • Jul 29, 2019

Forcing anyone to do anything they havent consented to isnt ethical. Its as simple as that.

Humiliation, and degradation plays a big part in this, its a turn on for the sub, but maybe not sexually, but the humiliation element, aspect is. I think DrWakko is also correct that for many the fantasy of not having a choice re an activity, though one would hope its based on consent, allows some people to enjoy, or partake in something they would not normally enjoy or want to do. Humans are complicated.

MasterBear​(other butch) • Jul 29, 2019

Depends.


If its a fantasy and the person is bi leaning, willing, and its negotiatioable- sure. It can still be considered forced bi.


If it is a hard no. Then no. It can be incredibly damaging.

Fyglia Wicked​(dom female) • Jul 30, 2019

Forced bi is a guise for sexual assault within the hetro male submissive population and less reported then hetro men not in lifestyle who have been sexually assaulted .

event horizon{NotLooking} • Jul 30, 2019

I'm sorry to hear that. I know some Dommes who have it as a requirement for the subs they seek, but also one who requires that they not actually like it. So, it doesn't sound right to me, and of course your situation doesn't either. But, having read some of the other comments here, perhaps it depends.

event horizon{NotLooking} • Jul 30, 2019

I considered the CNC comparison myself, but.. in CNC, the submissive is still engaging with a partner of the gender they prefer to be with. Perhaps this all depends on the Dominant and what the specifics are, but I know one in particular who sparked these questions for me, and I'm not so sure what she's doing is always ethical. Or maybe it's just mislabeled, or something.

I guess I'm seeing now, via these comments, that it depends on the parameters set by the Dominant. And I believe that for the ones who are doing things ethically, yeah, it's not really forced, it's "forced", because it's a scene. I just don't think it always goes that way, and some Dominants engaging in such things are actually doing harm.

event horizon{NotLooking} • Jul 30, 2019

The humiliation aspect just raises further questions, for me. Why should it be humiliating to want to engage in a homosexual act? I understand the logical answer to that question, I know many people are shamed for such things (I have been too), but.. is it ethical to perpetuate that feeling/idea? Should they not somehow be made to feel comfortable embracing their sexuality? Or.. does the humiliation aspect somehow allow some people TO embrace it? This is a lot to wrap one's head around lol.

And yes, I agree, humans are very complicated haha. As is their sexuality. There's just so many things a person can be, and ways to express those things. It boggles the mind.

event horizon{NotLooking} • Jul 30, 2019

I agree, but... the ethical part comes in knowing whether the sub is doing the thing because they actually find some enjoyment in it, or if they're doing the thing just because their Dominant ordered them to, and they want to please the Dominant. Like, this sort of thing in a M/s situation, where consent is implied for pretty much everything the Master/Mistress wants... what if the slave is straight? I mean like, really, really straight. And they HAVE to do the thing because the Master/Mistress said so, and they want to please their Master/Mistress and/or not be worried about losing them. Is it not unethical of the Master/Mistress in such a case, to not be respectful of their slave's actual sexuality, vs the Master's/Mistress' own desires?

I genuinely know someone who does *actual* forced bi with her sub. Not "forced", but legit FORCED. The sub is straight, and she actually prefers that he NOT enjoy the bi things she has him do. He is only ever allowed to touch himself if it is edging to gay porn. This is the kind of situation I don't understand. I want to believe that she is not being harmful, and that the sub does somehow find real enjoyment in the bi things he is told to do, but it really does not seem that way to me. It's possible that there's just more to the story, things that would make it make sense, but... the lines just get so blurry here, and I can't always tell who's right, and who might be deluding themselves into thinking they're right when they aren't.