Young Doms

tallslenderguy​(other male) • May 27, 2020

Great discussion. Thanks everyone for your thoughts and insights.

i'd prolly replace "Young Doms" with "Immature Doms." i don't think age or experience automatically confer wisdom or maturity. i think we often have an automatic expectation that someone who has "been in the lifestyle for many years" or has "lots of experience" equals understanding or expertise.

That's not just true about BDSM, but life in general. How many have worked for a 'manager' who didn't have a clue, but had been in that position and had the title for years?

i've talked with young Dom's who are/were brilliant. i've talked with inexperienced Dom's who i was drawn to regardless of their inexperience.

For me, the most powerful Dom knows and understands Their power AND They understand how to use it.

i think a mistake many make on both sides is that there can be a power exchange between labels.

tallslenderguy​(other male) • May 27, 2020

i should clarify this last sentence i wrote:
"i think a mistake many make on both sides is that there can be a power exchange between labels."

i think the "mistake" is thinking just because one "labels" their self "Dom" doesn't make them Dom. So many are caught up on image ("image is everything"), that coming off as something is what's important. Labels become important in that type of thinking. "I'm a Dom, I own you." Nah... right now all i have is the label "Dom" you have given me, and experience has taught me to investigate the contents before consuming, not just trust the label.

"Labels" are just an introduction. my most profound experiences with Doms have happened when the labels were not even used.