Munches

Munches

TheCuriousQuest​(sub female) • May 11, 2021

I have never been to a munch before. I was wondering, how do I approach one? Let’s just say I hypothetically get invited to one and I show up. How do I approach the munch? How do I start talking to people? What do we talk about? I guess I’m asking for your experience at a munch or any tips you can offer.

House Talion​(dom male) • May 12, 2021

Most munches are at a diner, some give out name tags. Say hi, have a seat, talk about whatever is on your mind.

MrFulmen • May 12, 2021

Wear normal street clothes. Use the manners your momma taught 'ya. Don't be in too much of a hurry to talk about hot and heavy kinky shit--just get to know people and chit chat a bit and get comfortable.

And expect the same from others. If someone stampedes straight to dirty talk, or expects to treat you like "a submissive" or "a dominant" instead of like any other human being, they are out of line and you have every right to back away and find someone else to talk to. If the whole event is like that, know that there are better events.

If a munch seems decent and non-creepy, go back several times. Don't expect the people there to become your best buddies instantly. Usually you've got to attend several times in order to start forming a rapport and making friends.

Bunnie • May 12, 2021

Just put one foot in front of the other. Sounds silly I know. However if we let them, nerves can stop us from doing so many things we want to do. I just told myself that I was obligated to no one but myself... if I didn’t like it I could leave at any time... I would just go and see what it was all about.

And what did I find there? A whole bunch of people just like me. Who had also been in the same position I was in at some stage or other.

The online world is no indication of what to expect offline. My experiences offline have been to find very warm and welcoming and encouraging people, who’s desire is to create a space for people to come together and share in our knowledge and curiosity and shared lifestyle choices. It’s a more intimate (in the sense of being smaller) connection with others who can relate to most of what we all go through. Of course, we’ve all heard that not all experiences are like that... so as MrFulmen said, go to different ones until you find the group that feels right for you.

And when you get there... just talk about whatever comes to mind. Ask questions. Be respectful, polite and civil. I don’t encourage people to drink a lot of alcohol, but that’s up to the individual persons choice. Personally, these days I don’t drink at all, but for my first few munches I had a glass or two to help calm my nerves (I’m very shy and socially awkward). Eat if you want to eat. Most people do, some don’t. Mingle if you want to mingle, or just sit and relax, people will come to you if they’re curious.

In my experiences, every munch I’ve been to has been different, which I really like. Some more casual, some bigger or smaller, some high energy and like a big happy social catch up, and some more quiet and relaxed and more like a lunch with friends. If you’re worried about anything, contact the coordinator and they’ll more than likely take you under their wing and help you ease into it with introductions and such. You’ll be fine! Take a deep breath, let it out, and go let yourself be seen

*also, at this time, check in to see what their Covid protocols are.