Too Soon / Concern issues

Too Soon / Concern issues

BDSM DOM​(dom male) • Aug 11, 2018

Seeing how I dont post topics on forums / blogs about my own personal issues, I figured to give it a try. I just hope that my first forum / blog doesn't offend any one. Now to the point of the post.

I recently was contacted VIA email by some one on this site asking to please take them on. This was their first email to me. After reading that very short email, my first thought was "you don't even know me yet" . I also personally feel things should be taken slow at first. Take time to get to know some one first. Anyways so I said to them in an email (get to know me first) and I asked when could we have a chance to talk. They replied anytime...So I asked them, if they would like to "text chat" on skype. They said they don't Text, they only talk on phone. I immediately saw a red flag. I dont mind phone calls, but NOT this soon. Both sides should work towards that in time. Not right away like they wanted. It's not something you do first thing. So the two things that are concerning me are is as follows:

1. they wanted to be taken on right away without us knowing one another first

2. they wanted phone contact first thing

In all honesty, I feel they need to slow down. No need to rush things. Anyways I welcome all opinions on this topic, please share your thoughts on this.

bighairydaddy • Aug 11, 2018

Sounds like there might have been some kind of scam going on. As a switch, I've been in contact with a few people claiming to be dominant who's wanted my phone number early. They don't get it. I know of scams that have been carried out where people ask for phone numbers, then search for said number on facebook and if you've added your number to your FB account, they have now gotten your identity. I think it's got something to do with identity theft. As someone in the position of a dominant, you have more reason to be in control with how contact happens but there are phone apps that get you a secod number. They'reusually free at first and only charge a small ammount every time you send a message or make a call. Hope this helps.

BDSM DOM​(dom male) • Aug 11, 2018

This helps indeed. I want to say ty for your view on this. It is much appreciated

bighairydaddy • Aug 11, 2018

No problem. I don't claim to be an expert or have have all the answers. But if you feel something is a red flag, follow your instict. They seem good.

Bunnie • Aug 11, 2018

I tend to be of the same mindframe, BDSM DOM, and agree with those as red flags. I also feel that this is important for people to see that it happens to everyone, regardless of which side of the / they fall on. Thank you for your post.

bighairydaddy • Aug 11, 2018

You're right Bunnie, also, this isn't the only scam to look out for. I'm not going to list them. They're searchable online. But there are loads. The main thing is to be wary of anyone wanting contact details (inc. email) of any sort too early. There's usually a nefarious reason for it.

FabSeverus​(dom male) • Aug 11, 2018

you mention email? why did you give your email address?

Fudbar​(dom male){❤️❤️❤️} • Aug 11, 2018

He meant site email...and it's much easier and safer to create a separate email address for Kink than to risk a phone number.

If you give someone your phone number, you will show up in their 'people you may know' feed on Facebook. It's a nasty intrusive algorithm that crawls the deepest of deep web stuff.

bighairydaddy • Aug 11, 2018

Actually I meant that some scamers will ask for your email adress to then try to scam you without risking losing their account on the dating site that they've met the other person on. It's always a red flag to me. Please keep in mind that I didn't start this thread. I'm just answering someone else's question

Fudbar​(dom male){❤️❤️❤️} • Aug 11, 2018

Oops. My mistake. Yes, someone wanting to move communication off site ASAP should be a red flag. A lot do this with Kik too.

Once again, burner emails are the solution. Takes just a minute to create a new Gmail or Hotmail account.