evergrey{Ashigeru}sub female
evergrey{Ashigeru}
I write BDSM erotica and guides. I teach a local BDSM 101 class. I used to train in a full contact knockdown martial art, I'm an avid horse person who is currently without an equine, I train in Sado, the way of the Japanese tea ceremony, I read a lot of books, play RPGs and survival games on my computer, and enjoy doing a bit of nature photography. I have recently taken up gardening quite passionately. I love growing my own vegetables and berries, though I rarely get to EAT any of said berries. Freakin' SQUIRRELS.
I also greatly enjoy fishkeeping and aquascaping.
I'm 44 years old.
Seeking LOCAL experienced poly dom in the central-to-upstate New York area to date, though the pandemic means taking a long time to get to know one another online. Sorry folks, I don't do online play.
Very much into D/s. I prefer positive, nurturing dominance over angry, "you're in trouble/not good enough" type of dominance. It is not a hard and fast rule, but I prefer older male doms. I am not, however, into age play.
I love sensation play, love sexual play, have a moderate pain threshold, enjoy comfortable bondage, and a lot of other stuff. It depends on what I and my partners have in common! Each dynamic is different.
Please don't be into conspiracy theories, and please do be pro-science and education. If you are into hardcore far-right/alt-right stuff, "Western Chauvinism," Proud Boys, Redpill, white supremacy, anti-queer, ETC, we are going to have too many conflicting views. I do date conservatives, despite not being one myself, along with moderates and folks who are liberal like me, but I just can't hang with extremism. That does include some really radical far-left, violent, purity politics, black and white, eat-their-own types, too. I have strong views, but do not enjoy political debate. I read up, I vote, I sometimes quietly discuss with some people, but I don't make it my whole identity. I have to take good care of my mental health, and I need to be able to feel safe with my partners, and able to rest with them, not be constantly tense and on guard.
I have been with my Master ( he is Ashigeru on here) for about 14 years now. He is my beloved, my primary, and my fiancé. I don't sneak around on him- anyone who is wanting to date me/play with me would need to be willing to meet him and keep up a bit of communication with him.
Consent is key. Consent is everything. Mutual respect. Strong, good communication. Negotiation is an alive, dynamic, continuous thing.
Reputation is important. I understand that sometimes people get a bad rap for bad reasons, and people get ostracized when they do not deserve to, but I also recognize that there are toxic people in (and on the fringes of) our community, as well as some predators. Any person in the lifestyle worth their salt is not going to get upset by vetting and reference checks, and will be open an honest if there is something about their reputation that is not so stellar. The more data points, the better! We are our deeds. How people behave, how they learn, and how they have handled it when they HAVE made a mistake, all matter quite a bit.
I love love love a number of sexual forms of consensual non-consent. This is, of course, something that takes time and trust, something that knowledge of one another helps a lot in terms of safety.
I'm a screamer. I writhe and moan. I move, I breathe, I am very responsive. I love eye contact. I love to serve. I love to take things for my partners, to please them, to bring them joy, to endure for them and ride waves of sensation with them. I love that primal ferocity that comes with rough, forceful sex. In bondage, I am free.
Ah yeah, and if we decide we're going to play sexually or alone, we ARE showing each other our driver's licenses or IDs. If you aren't willing to let me know your name, age, and where you live, then we aren't having sex, and you aren't getting me alone. Trust, but verify. That's my policy due to far too many personal experiences that have proved it is a needed step. If you are freaked out and offended by this, we aren't meant to be.
I moved to Vernon, NY with my Master and my platonic life partner. The three of us share a big old house out here. We were talked into moving to NY from California by someone who would become my secondary, but he dumped me over the covid-19 vaccine, the election, and my not believing in Qanon stuff. I'm immunocompromised, and I am going to have to rely on vaccine-driven herd immunity to survive, so, yeah. I am really finding community here now, in Syracuse and Watertown especially, and when the numbers are good, I am very much enjoying connecting with my community in person, especially with groups that require vaccination and safety measures. SSC applies to keeping one another safe, too!
Village life is peaceful, but boy do you have to drive a long way (and watch for buggies) to be with the kink community! At least the drives are pretty?
Pro tip: if you want to catch someone's interest, first of all, carefully read their profile! (If you got this far, you are already way ahead of the curve, heh!) Write a letter personalized for them. I don't mean "hey" or "hi" or "what's up" and I really don't mean a pervy-ass one-liner that would get you slapped on the street. Write a little introduction! Tell the person you are writing to a little bit about yourself, and maybe why you messaged them. Broach a conversation topic, and contribute meaningfully to the conversation. Effort and thoughtfulness, as well as respect, will get you a hell of a lot farther than sending off 30 "sup"s to random people who happen to be the gender you prefer.
If you want to play with me, and are a local dom, please include "sanguine" in the title of your first message to me, to show that you bothered to read my profile. If you can't even be assed to learn who I am before messaging, you're almost certainly just looking for a quick and easy wank.
PS- I really mean it when I say I am looking for someone L O C A L. Thank you!