In my day-to-day life, I am single, tall, attractive, with a full head of dark hair, polite, articulate, intelligent, competent with a good sense of humor. I don’t smoke, do drugs, and drink very little. I work hard and am reliable and honest.
Walking down the street, I don’t believe anyone would look and think, freak or weirdo. However, my true self is that of a combination of a submissive, sissy, cuckold, and obedient servant, bedwetting pre-teen that really craves and does well with rules, control, discipline, direction, being used, and appreciated.
I was always a bit shy, grew up an only child, was a bedwetter into my early teens, and did not date until after high school. I figured I was supposed to be the dominant one in a relationship, but found I always drifted to my true desire of being the submissive.
Not exactly hung, or a stud, I quickly sharpened my cunnilingus skills. Women seemed to enjoy. Married, we dabbled in BDSM, switching on who got tied up, spanked, etc. My wife thought it disgusting (without ever talking about it) that one night I went down on her after coming inside of her. Guess that meant I was gay. She cut me off of sex for some time until one night she came onto me, broke out a vibrator, had me roll over and get up on my knees. She lubes me up and penetrates me with the vibrator while reaching around and stroking me. I came, this must have been some “gay test” or some nonsense. Because of her immaturity and lack of communication abilities, we divorced.
I delved more into BDSM and specifically FemDom. Lived with a Domme, very much enjoyed bondage, spanking, flogging, pegging, diapers, and plastic panties orgasm control and humiliation. Met and played with several women. Later became a couple with a woman who became my Mistress, and we enjoyed hair removal, chastity, orgasm control, humiliation, only allowed panties, sissy maid and vintage lingerie, cuckold, cream pie eating, ass worship, domestic discipline, and more.
For non-kink reasons, that chapter ended. Ended up turning to dominant men for humiliation, chastity, spanking, lingerie, and cock sucking. Realized I just liked being controlled and used by whomever.
Currently single. Had some health problems that I had to work through and resolve, and will be looking to get back to serving/playing with a Dominant Woman or Man or Couple.
While I appear and function as a competent, intelligent, articulate adult gentleman in the world, deep down, I and all of my previous intimate partners know the truth. I am a failure at what society considers a real man. After years of poor performance, unable to get it up, premature ejaculation, having a sissy clitty vs a penis/cock and not having the Alpha Male instincts that the real, hot women I’ve known desire for a lover, and after a couple of women and men showed me what I truly was and in what environment I need to function at my best, I know what I need relationship wise.
I know that I truly need to be owned, collared, controlled, trained, disciplined, humbled, humiliated, cuckolded and used. I’m a sissy boy, bedwetting teen(adult) with a small sissy clit that should be locked 24/7 in a small chastity device and the key held by my owner. Not allowed body hair, male underwear, only allowed feminine lingerie or put into diapers/plastic panties, sissy maid’s uniforms, baby dresses and other girly clothes in private and under my (boy or androgynous) clothes when out in public. I am a very enthueastic pussy, ass and cock worshiper. I am very service oriented and know how to cook, do laundry, be your sissy maid/wife and such. I know I need rules and structure and regular domestic discipline and humiliation. I know I’ll never be inserting my sissy clit into anyone, rather my holes should be used for the pleasure of others. I know I should be collared and owned by one person/a couple, however they of course would be free to have relations with whomever they please. I know that in addition to the obvious dominance that I do well under, I also need guidance and nurturing, so a Dominant Mommy/Daddy would work best.
For now, getting back into reading, seeing what all is going on in the scene, learning, etc. Looking to strike up conversations and see where that leads down the road. I’m not seeking a bunch of random “hook ups”, rather to develop friendships with like minded people, leading to meetings and if all agreeable to service/play and potentially a longer term relationship. That might take to form of a marriage, partner, Mistress/Mommy, Master/Daddy that I live with, anm the sissy maid/wife, rent a room/nursery from or serve occasionally.