In a monogamous relationship
Sensual dominant, with a sadistic streak and a fetish for rope bondage
I am Separated, negotiating an open marriage.
Until 02/20/20, I was single/separated. we were staying married a few more months so my future ex-wife could collect higher social security when she decided to apply.
On o2/20/20, 22 months after we decided to separate, 13 months after we moved into separate housing, she said she wantef us to be in an open marriage (where we have no say in each other’s lives) and stay Separated with a goal of reuniting as a couple in 2-3 years.
I’ve never felt like “it’s complicated” applies before, but it’s complicated. We are renegotiating our marriage with negotiations expected to last for months.
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I have posted about 150 posts on another message board in the last 6 months, about one third of them erotic excerpts from my four(4) unpublished novels.
This website is so new to me, I haven't decided what to do here - so far I am reading blogs and flirting with serious intent.
I am a Dom. Even without a sub right now, in real life my dom tends to come out around subs, slaves, bottoms, and many switches. Not in commanding words or a pushy way, but in the way I feel and the way some people respond to me. I'm a happy Dom and don't need to be any more sadistic than a play partner desires.
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I am demisexual. Casual sex is not possible for me. As a male, there is "No erection without connection." IF I try to force myself, I experience cooties big time, no matter how hot she is. And yes, she. I don't fantasize about men. That's how my body rolls.
I haven't had sex in 3 or 4 years. I think about sex a lot!
I am an INFP male
I flirt in search of a friendship connection. I crave romance, love, and sex. For me, they all start with emotional connection. It all starts with being friends.
I will move to a new job in a new state. I want to move someplace that fits my clothes (Hawaiian shirts.) Sometime in the next year or so, I will move somewhere.
I believe in honest, proactive communication. I can enjoy kinky play, without an emotional connection, but it's not what I crave.
Except for rope, I have thoroughly enjoyed the experience with everyone I’ve ever tied. My perfect work day would be tieing 3-4 hours with practice partners before and after work.
I love performing music and would have been a professional if I had a better memory. I have been recorded singing in a choir, playing tabla for meditation, and Djembe for a fund raiser. I have played trombone in bars, large concerts, christmas caroling on a San Francisco cable car, and the circus. I sometimes play my Ibanez electric Bass. There is a weekly Blues Jam 5 blocks from my house.
When i am reading, I read about 300 trashy romance novels a year. When I am writing, it takes about 2 months plus a pause before editting for a 64,000 word novel.
I have visited about 45 of the 50 united states enjoying mostly museums and nature parks. I've spent a few weeks in Canada, Mexico, and Italy in multiple visits. I have lived in California, Arizona, Upstate New York, Boston, and the Midwest - and am ready for someplace new where I can find a decent job.
I was introduced into the lifestyle about 12 years ago by a sub who became my wife. I immersed myself in Boston's BDSM community for about a year. The D/s in her was not as strong as in me. It faded, and she decided it didn't fit, after about 4 years. She was menopausal, and lost her interest in vanilla sex after 4 more years. After 2 more years, I drunkenly shared a secret (I get drunk every few years), she lost trust, and our marriage was mostly dead. 3 years later she feels she is regaining her trust of me, we are separated and negotiating. We have been seperated over a year.
I have been aware of BDSM since I was a teenager, but the 70s BDSM scene in the San Francisco Bay Area was mostly gay men, frequently violent, with no negotiation and sometimes no consent. That wasn't a good fit for me. I did like the black leather fashion parts.
Bottom Line - 95% of my play has been with my one submissive partner. Negotiation wasn't really a thing between us, we knew each others limits from months of discussion by the time we met. I have had a great time with the 3 negotiations I have had in the last 6 months - things can get quite steamy :)
I enjoy being a service top to nice people.
Rude and stupid people don’t get a beating.
Sex, blood, poop & bad music
I showed someone how to self suspend in February. Working on more comfy hip and thigh support.