|New York, New York, United States|
I recently came across this remark in a comment to a post at a group, "I play with a couple and they tell me it makes their bond much stronger."
YES, that is 100% true in our case as well. People sometimes ask me why, if I'm a masochist, didn't I marry a sadistically oriented man instead of a masochistically oriented one just like myself. And, my answer is because, no matter how tender the after-care, and no matter how much he said he loved me, the fact that I would know that he gets genuine pleasure out of torturing and tormenting me would always leave a seed of doubt in my mind, and I'd always wonder if he really loved me or if he was just selfishly exploiting my masochism for his own personal benefit and gain. I don't have those doubts with my husband.
I mean, in the heat of sexual passion people will whisper things like, "Oh, God, Baby, I love you so much I'd die for you". But, it's just pillow talk. Remarks like that are just sweet nothings. A lot of husbands who say that to their wives in bed will run the other way, and leave their wives high and dry to fend for themselves, if real danger came their way. My husband, jon, isn't like that. I know that he'd deliberately put himself in harms way to protect me. I know that because I've watched him do it many times.
When the two of us are in an S&M situation, jon has actually sacrificed himself in order to spare me from further pain and suffering. We've been in situations where he's pleaded with the people torturing us not to stop his pain but to stop MINE. The two of us have been put in "predicament bondage" situations where he's had to keep his body is some VERY strenuous position because if he relaxed our bondage connection would inflict pain on me in some way. I've watched him strain and struggle to the point of screaming trying with everything he had to maintain his own anguish and misery rather then relax and be the cause of my pain. I've watched him do that to the point where it broke my heart, made me cry, and compelled me to literally beg him to get some relief and let me share the torture with him. He never does that until he reaches the point where he just can't physically keep it up anymore and just can't go on any longer. And, when he does relax, and it does start causing me pain, it breaks his heart to see what it's doing to me. He'll actually cry too and actually beg me to forgive him for not being stronger. He won't even let me endure it for very long. He'll start straining after as little rest as possible to try and regain the position he has to hold to prevent hurting me.
I ask you, how could you not love a man like that. And, because he does that for me, I tend to be just as selfless and self sacrificing on his behalf too. Yes, I watch people treat him like a dog. Yes, I watch people abuse him as if he were just a spineless wimp. But, I know he isn't. He has a status in my eyes that no Dom could ever have, and I know his love for me is genuinely true in a way that no Dom could ever really convince me. We share a bond that's probably stronger and more enduring then the vast majority of married couples. And, it's mainly because the two of us are masochists and because the two of us share situations where we have the chance to prove our mutual love in the most meaningful ways possible. So, I can certainly agree with that comment above.
After reading way I said above, I guess you can probably understand why my husband and I say that when we're tortured together by other people we're actually making love to each other. :-)
Give this a read and its a beautiful story.
I would like to find a woman that would like to have a relationship of this kind. That would like to build this kind of bond with me. I am not a cruel or hateful person. Some people may look at BDSM as an assault or attack but others may look at it as a caress or an act of love. A just more elaborate way of foreplay.
Now before leaving you let me offer a song.
PM or comment. I will respond to all but if I do not then comment within my post or discussion.
PM for my phone number.