My selfishness comes back to bite me. To suck on my blood and drain me. It tells me i deserve this, that im here because of me. How dare you beleive you are more than this. Making me weak. But what my vampire does not see, is the strength that it gives me. Each time i lay almost lifeless my hope grows stronger still.
She is kind to me. She holds me tight while i come undone. Then when i think of giving up she whispers in my ear. Picks up my insecurities and hugs them tight. Giving them her warmth. And lay them on me like a blanket.
My vampire sees only what he wants. Thinks he's winning with every poke and prod. I lay there quietly with tears on my cheeks. Till he's finished playing with me.
Im safe snuggled under my blanket. You can not reach me. But i might need a moment to sleep. To recharge. To rest my heavy head and aching heart. But when i rise it will be bright. I will make my hope proud.
