THE KINKY POET

The Ron 5001

Better than the original, it's design has been improved, it can now scan your body and tell when you're in the mood

Sensors pick up your pheromones, it knows when you're turned on, it also comes with Bluetooth to play your favourite romantic song

Designed with a working tongue, it's made to lick, and lap until your poked, it will play on your pussy until your bed is soaked

Adjustable licking speeds, it works by voice command, harder, faster, deeper it follows your demand

He has a special phone app, you can even call your mate, you can use it to control his cock, you can switch from full thrust to a vibrate

New nimble fingers, they pinch, they scratch, they pull, tell The Ron 5001 what you want this toy can do it all

Realistic hair and six pack, he's recharged in a quicker time, he still has all the older models features, he still loves to tell you rhyme

Now he can multi task, he can suck and fuck and talk, his knees have been redesigned, to give him a more realistic natural walk

So you could take him to the park, or find a quiet place to play, with his built in Sat Nav, you won't get lost that day

But the best new feature we've saved till last, it's bigger than those written about above, the new Ron 5001, can actually learn to love

THE KINKY POET 

It's nearly Halloween my favourite time. Was watching Nightmare in Elm Street. This came to mind

Horror night

Freddy Krueger, Jason or Chucky which one scares you most, or is it the thought of Hannibal Lecter, spreading you on his toast

Maybe it's Vampires, Werewolf or paranormal stuff, what makes you hide behind your hands, when you've had enough

Killers who hide in the house, the ones who wait till you're asleep, then comes out to cut your throat, with a slash that goes so deep

Maybe it's a stalker, Peeping through your window late at night, trying see a away of getting in, to make you his that night

Or is it more recent like the Slenderman or maybe Annabelle, there are so many in the night, where your fear comes from who can tell

But there's one thing you can be sure of, whatever causes you such fear, know that everytime the light goes out, one of them a near

Waiting in your wardrobe, or laying underneath your bed, can you hear them breathing or is that just in your head

It's very nearly Halloween, the time for you to get a fright, so you better watch a scary film and prepare for horror night

THE KINKY POET 

The Ron 5000

I am the Ron 5000, I'm the latest robotic sexual boy, I'm programmed to bring you pleasure and to bring you sexual joy

I'm versed in many positions, I'm very flexible and fun, my cock is multi functional, it's design for your pussy, mouth and bum

It can grow to different sizes, from length and also girth, to make sure you are satisfied, I'm guaranteed you'll get your monies worth

I'm programmed to do bondage, I'll put you across my knee, I will do everything required, I will follow every plea

I recite sexual poetry, I can sense when your pussy's wet, I'll give you multiple orgasms, I'm the best fuck you can get

I come with many outfits, but you can purchase more online, just keep me charged and updated, I'll be ready anytime

I promise never to say no, I am the perfect type of man, I only swear if you want me to, only when you say I can

I can treat you like you are a Queen, or a dirty little whore, from sitting on your Royal throne, to being fucked right on the floor

I don't get drunk or stay out late, I never ask you where you've been, I don't care if you've had others, or how many men you've seen

I'm waterproof and my skin feels real, you can bring me in the shower, you can share me with your friends, though my charging takes a hour

For I'm the Ron 5000, just here to make sigh and cum, then just put me back inside my box, once your needs are done

THE KINKY POET 

Used today

It's always wet and wiggly, it's hungry for some play, it's desperate to get inside a hole, every single day

It loves to flex its muscles, it loves to fence and fight, like two famous Swordsman, dueling through the night

It probes and flicks and parries, looking to get the most control, looking to strike the killer blow, inside your mouth it loves to go

Moving down your body, it tracks your every sensual curve, running around your nipples, electrifying every nerve

Painting patterns on your body, though none will be seen or found, plotting his course to ecstasy, deep inside your mound

With thumbs he parts your petals, the way for the tongue is clear, he holds you by your sexy hips, he pulls you in so near

So now your pussy's within its reach, the hungry tongue has found its goal, it dives inside your wetness, digging towards your soul

Now it's at the place it loves the best, doing the job what a tongue is for, pleasuring a dream girl, no tongue could ask for more

Sipping on her dripping Peach, juices running down the tongue, he dances on her cliterus, until she blows her cum

Then get scoops up his reward, his job is nearly done, he snuggles up to dance upon her nape, until the morning Sun

He loves to leave her happy, he's flexed his muscles for this day, he rests now sound in the knowledge, he's been used today

THE KINKY POET 

This poem was inspired by the awesome sex toy reviews on her blogs I have her permission to name her so Cressida Clytie, thank you for the inspiration which led to my poem. I hope it does you proud

Sliver Bullet

You got a Silver Bullet but it's not made for any type of gun, it's dances on your cliterus or vibrates on your bum

Small sleek and shiny, it let's off a aggressive sounding hum, you place it on your G-spot, it's guaranteed to make you cum

Discreetly hides in your handbag, like a Chrome covered hard lipstick, always waiting for the time, you can't find a dick

With a button on the top, it pulsates at several speeds, from a slow hard throb to a rockets thrust, it fulfils your sexual needs

Who thought so much power, could reside in such a toy, it's no bigger than a small cock but it brings you so much joy

Solid and reliable, through constant use it doesn't brake, always bringing satisfaction, your world it loves to shake

This is a fair assessment, a honest and true review, to all that doesn't own one, you all need to get one too

It doesn't need your loving, just batteries, cleaning and no more, it will wait there sitting patiently, in your special drawer

So next time you buy a sex toy, keep this poem in your brain, remember the Silver Bullet, then you will cum, time and time again

THE KINKY POET

Stick it into me

Just put your cock in me, impale me with your meaty lance, don't worry a romance and foreplay, just fuck me take the chance

Throw me against the wall, force me up against the door, give me your meat injection, I'm your horny little whore

Grab me by the throat, control me with a simple squeeze, make me do your bidding, drop me to my knees

I'll suck it hard, I'll nibble slow, stick it in every hole I own, give me your loving stick, please Daddy make me moan

I love to take you deep throat, I hunger for you in my ass, I'm your cocks playground, you know you never need to ask

No matter what I'm doing, I'm always hungry for your cock, like a good girl I am ready, I'm available around the clock

I'm your 24 hour cock toy, I'll wear anything you choose, for you I am a sure thing, with me you cannot lose

Anytime you want me, just come up from behind, I'm never wearing undies and I'm always moist you'll find

So come Daddy I'm ready, let your needs and lusts go free, please get out your meaty lance, and stick it into me

THE KINKY POET 

Innocence lost

You sure we want to do this, I'm still prepared to wait, I don't want to rush you, say now before it gets to late

Yes of course I love you, I have done from the very start, yes I think your sexy, you own my life and heart

Ok, Ok if your sure, let's just start off with a tender kiss, then we'll let our love go free, if you're sure it is your wish

It's not that I don't want to, I want to go all the way with you, but you know it is our first time and I'm not sure what to do

That's it you touch me and I'll touch you, I'm getting hard as you can see, I can feel your wetness, it means that you want me

Ok spread your legs, I'll climb in between your thighs, I'm gonna put the tip in, yes that's fear shown in my eyes

Tell me if it hurts you, just nod if you want me to push some more, I'm sure we could of found a better place than your best mates bathroom floor

Oh my god that feels real nice, you are so wet and warm, I hope we can do this again, before nighttime turns to dawn

I promise not to cum inside, though we are using that stolen rubber, my god we are doing it, I swear I'll never love  another

I can feel a shaking, your writhing hard on the bathroom floor, oh god I think I've cum, we're innocents no more

THE KINKY POET 

Know that you are real

It started with a quick hello, a messege sent across the line, now your all I think about and how you look so fine

I close my eyes and you are there, I dream of your pretty smiles, its amazing how close you feel to me, though we're devided by so many miles

The distance between us is closed by things share across the internet, I feel like we are getting closer, though we've never met

I wonder what it would feel like, to feel you skin to skin, a chance to hold you in my arms, so i let my dream begin

For within my dreams you are here beyond all space and time, when I'm in my dream like world, it feels like you are mine

Distance is irrelevant, the real world just counts for nought, though I miss you in the morning, I love the happiness you've brought

So I thank you for reaching out and for all the messages we share, I know you are so far away but I wish that I was there

There to say good morning, to be the last thing you see at night, to hold your body close to me, no matter if it's dark or light

Then I wouldn't have to dream of you, or guess how your kisses feel, because I could kiss you tenderly and know that you are real

THE KINKY POET 

Drawn

As the strength of the full moon, pulls the sea towards shore, just one simple dream of you, makes me want you more

Just as the Sea rushes forward, to gently kiss the sand, I hope you come into my dream, so I can hold your hand

Just like the huge Sunflower what tracks the Sun each day, I track you in my mind and heart, what more can I say

Following your pretty smile, you are brighter than the Sun, I'm warmed by your loving eyes, you truly are the one

Just as my ears are drawn to a beautifully written song, you fill my heart with a joyous love, my heart's where you belong

Like being pulled by the strongest magnet, I'm drawn into my dreams, looking for you baby, you are the one it seems

All day I think of you, I write my thoughts of you in rhyme, being drawn towards the nighttime, when I can make you mine

Spending the night with you, until I lose you to the dawn, then I spend the day just waiting, to the nighttime again I'm drawn

THE KINKY POET 

Promised land

I wonder if your out there, searching just like me, wondering if true love can be found, to let you heart fly free

Is the other part of your puzzle, searching just like you, looking for that perfect fit, to make a love that's whole and true

Is your perfect soul mate, wandering through their sleep, looking, hoping, wishing, to find a heart to share and keep

As the universe does it's thing, as the world still turns, is there a perfect partner, sharing all your dreams and yearns

Like two passing ships in the night, did your chance go by, surely you didn't miss your chance, did your hope just fade and die

Are you going in separate ways, are you both lost inside the void, destined to be alone forever, this fate you must avoid

Or are they still out there, seaching with a out stretched hand, just waiting for you to take it, then lead them to the promised land

THE KINKY POET