FullCanadian(switch male){MissB}

Corrections and addendums

Just odd errata.

BDSM Dungeon Etiquette

3 years ago. April 14, 2021 at 7:30 PM

Just a quick correction on some recently blogged misinformation:

It's perfectly ok to approach and talk to strangers at a BDSM dungeon, even submissives. NEVER touch or invade personal space, but questions are ALWAYS welcome. No one will ever kick you out for asking a polite question. EVER.

Note: there are a small subset of individuals that practice high protocol BDSM. Additional rules and protocol may apply in these or any private space.

Most dungeons also feature additional helpful cues here. Wristbands, balloons, marked areas, times, and special events* all exist to help with boundaries and controlling unwanted contact.

*used to distinguish those who wish to be approached and/or play from those who don't.

My point is that your local dungeon is a very welcoming and accommodating place. They'll have clearly posted rules, none of which will read "don't speak to other people". You will not be kicked out, blacklisted or bothered. High Protocol only clubs do exist but are the exception not the rule. Besides, you're not getting into those without personal and local vetting, so don't worry about it.

If anyone doubts any of this, please contact your local club or munch and reach out. They're always happy to dispel bad internet myths. If nothing else, it gives them a good laugh.

SweetSirRendering(sub female) - i feel subs can also state on their profile whether they wish to be contacted or not and what their protocol is in their own dynamic

3 years ago

FullCanadian(switch male){MissB} - I don't recall stating otherwise. My words are my own. Statements attributed to me are another matter.

3 years ago

SweetSirRendering(sub female) - i’m confused by your response. was adding this comment to what you stated, that i liked and responded to, which helped tie it to this site.

3 years ago

FullCanadian(switch male){MissB} - To add to the confusion, I like ice cream. And your comment. But not confusion.

3 years ago

FullCanadian(switch male){MissB} - To clear up confusion, this site isn't a high protocol dungeon, and unless there's a clear preference for communication stated in a profile, anyone can message anyone. Think of it as a virtual munch; if someone is here, it's for conversation and interaction. The rules are clearly stated. Enforcing high protocol roleplaying in all interactions isn't one of them. Some feel strongly enough about that fallacy that they block and lecture those that politely disagree.

I'm not one of those, nor do I approach those that are. But I do speak my mind. As should everyone.

3 years ago

SweetSirRendering(sub female) - i’m glad you understand my comment :)

confusion has clearly been cleared.

3 years ago

Literate Lycan(dom male) - Thank you for the information. I also agree with the above comment by SSR and extension of your blog that within the confines of the Cage, individuals can indicate on their profiles how they wish to be approached . . . Or even not approached . . .regardless of their status or brackets / collar. . . Whether they are taken or not looking or protected or in an established D/s. They can even restrict message and contact to only those they initiate contact, so if they really don’t want to be approached, there is that method. And to be certain, if I have a pre-existing friendship with someone and they enter a dynamic, I and my friend will respect the lines of communication as WE establish it. No outside source or influence will dictate that I cannot contact my friend, whether they are submissive, Dominant, switch or twitch. (Note: The individual and their other are considered inside influence - someone writing a blog that is not part of the equation is considered so far outside it isn’t funny). Great blog. Sorry for my diatribe.

3 years ago

Bunnie - We also had another one that went with not touching others or invading personal space: never touch anyone’s stuff without permission.
I really love this blog. Although I haven’t yet read the blog you’re referring to, I agree that there is so much misinformation flying around online in regards to the offline communities... it really does require correction from those with the knowledge.

3 years ago

FullCanadian(switch male){MissB} - Yes, I didn't get into toy and locker room etiquette, that's even more nuanced. My point being that one shouldn't scare new people away with scary tales of uber strict rules and protocol; my IRL experience has been the exact opposite. Too many new people *want* there to be layers of rules and mystery and uberDoms. One shouldn't feed those illusions. It only leads people into the arms of newb hunters. BDSM is people interacting. Nothing much changes from vanilla there. Point being, asking "dumb" questions, common sense, and speaking up if you see something that concerns you are still crucial.

3 years ago

HGB(sub female){Scottish M} - I've never encountered anybody having an issue with questions at dungeons before. I have been told though not to interrupt the scene. I have encountered a couple of high protocol people in Munch's even though but you can kind of usually figure it out because people don't just go generally going up and talking to them and they don't go talking to other people. But it's not very common.

3 years ago

FullCanadian(switch male){MissB} - Exactly, and good point. I assumed common sense would dictate that one doesn't interrupt a scene, and "don't be a creep" covers why you shouldn't watch from 3 feet away without asking before the scene. But before or after*, especially at a demo, ask questions. I've learned some amazing things in those circumstances.

*use common sense and don't interrupt aftercare if asking after a scene.

3 years ago

HGB(sub female){Scottish M} - I learned a lot at a demo it was great. There are too many people who are afraid to go to Munch's and they are, for me they have been the most amazing people, the most kind, they ask consent before hugs. People seem to act like they're going to meet up with cannibals and they're going to be dinner that is not the case. I heard once if they're wielding something and you don't want to get hit don't be within in range, if you are in range you have consented to being hit

3 years ago

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FullCanadian​(switch male){MissB}

Corrections and addendums

BDSM Dungeon Etiquette

FullCanadian(switch male){MissB}