As subs, littles, or slaves, we often overlook the importance of acknowledging our achievements, both big and small. It’s time we start being kinder to ourselves, giving ourselves credit where it’s due, and celebrating even the simplest wins—like remembering to drink enough water. Each of us has unique strengths and challenges, and what might be a significant achievement for one person could seem minor to another. But that doesn’t make it any less valid. Only you know the effort it took, and that accomplishment is yours alone. So here’s my little piece on recognizing and celebrating my own progress.
For context, my Daddy has been going through a tough few weeks. In the midst of it all, he asked for “space” to manage everything, saying he wouldn’t be as present with me. This was a first for me; even in my vanilla relationships, I’d never been asked for “space.” It took me by surprise, but I agreed because I knew he needed time to work things out.
Despite agreeing, it was a hard adjustment. For the first couple of days, I struggled internally, wrestling with a flood of emotions. But after a talk with a close friend I met here on The Cage, I realized that needing space isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Some people just work through things better on their own. With that understanding, I found peace and started to manage things on my own. Sure, I had moments of doubt, but I kept moving forward.
My Daddy has always believed in self-betterment and often tells me, “If I’m hit by a bus tomorrow, I want to know that you’ll be okay and can keep going with everything I’ve taught you.” While the idea terrifies me, I knew he was right, and it became clear that building my own independence was important, whether he was there or not.
So, I decided to use this time to test myself by following the rules and routines my Daddy had set for me, but independently, without his guidance. I won’t lie—it was challenging. I had to hold myself accountable, knowing that slipping up would only impact me and disrupt everything else. Once that reality hit, I put on my big-girl panties and took my routine seriously.
Last week, my Daddy told me that things had improved, and he’d call by the end of the week. I had missed him so much, so when he called, it felt amazing. I caught him up on all my new accomplishments at work and my progress with my routine. Just before we ended the call, I shared how I’d been “testing” his theory of independence and that I thought I’d done pretty well. He agreed, and when I joked about giving myself a sticker from my jar, he surprised me by saying I absolutely should. He told me how proud he was of me for how I’d handled everything. When we ended the call, I went and picked out my biggest sticker, gave it to myself, and called it a night.
So, to all my subs, littles, slaves, etc., give yourself that sticker because, honey, you know you deserve it! Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. And to all the Daddys, Mommys, Sirs, and Masters out there, let them have the treat they’ve been working for!
