"Happy 40th Birthday Dude!" I said, as we all hung out in my buddy's back yard. Fun party as usual. This dude, he was the type of guy who was always down for stuff. Wanna go out on the town? Take a walk in the hills, or whatever? This was the guy I would call. Just a regular fun guy. I'd known his girlfriend longer than him; she and I went way back. Anyway, a couple people had got him some stuff, but I was thinking, all this is cool and all, I didn't get him anything but I had another idea.
I'll buy him an adventure!
"Dude, let's go fucking rafting. It will be awesome! I'll go book us a trip, we'll do the Staircase section, Payette River Garden Valley to Banks! I'll pay for it, don't worry about it."
So I take the day off work, pick him up, and we head up there. It's about 45 minutes away, up the road into the mountains. These guys supply the rafts and paddles, and they kind of tell you what's going on as you paddle down, but you are the crew- usually five to seven people and 1 guide per boat.
"Man, I'm stoked," my buddy says. "I thought I was going to miss it this year!" We had gone the last two years but it had been his girlfriend's dad who had paid those last two times.
So, we hop on a bus and they take us to the put-in spot, outside of Garden Valley. We hop out, get issued our rental life jackets, paddles and helmets. "As you are paddling, be mindful of the guy behind you," they always tell us, giving us the usual Safety Talk(tm) and opening spiel. "...Otherwise someone will get summer teeth. That's when summer your teeth are in your mouth and summer your teeth are in the boat!"
We board our rafts and start cruising downriver. Getting the hang of paddling and following the commands; "Left side forward," "All back," "All Forward!" the guide barks. We are old hat at this though. The green horns, newbies, whatever you call the first timers pick it up quickly. Eventually we get to the first rapid. "Okay, Right side!" we steer to the inner edge, avoiding some submerged rocks. Then "All Forward!" as we cruise through the churning white water. On shore, a large doberman barks. "We call this rapid "Barking Dog," The guide informs us.
A little ways past that, is the next rapid, "Bronco Billy." We steer towards the middle of the river, and waves of churning water toss us airborne. "All forward!" the guide says. I am trying to dig the paddle into the churning white water, half the time only digging into foam and spray, as the boat lurches through troughs and peaks, spray drenching us. All of us are laughing hysterically, heart pounding, with sheer joy. It's like the "Log Ride" at the amusement park but...this is a hundred times better. Another rapid catches us a little further down, then a ways beyond that, we see a sudden drop off. The guide says, "Right side! Right side!" I am sitting on the left, toes hooked in under the seat in front of me. I don't have to paddle...yet...but suddenly a large overhanging boulder looms ahead of me. Are you sure, I think to myself. But then I remember- we have to steer tight to the inside here, as there is a nasty eddy on the left that can flip boats. "Okay....Rightside forwardleftsideBACK!" the guide commands us, as we start to drift dangerously towards the rock. We miss it, to my relief. I am getting bucked back and forward, clinging on with my toes to avoid getting pitched, but we make it through, drenched and giggling like 4 year olds at a splash pool party.
We stop for a break a little ways here,on a section of sandy beach just a temporary rest, before the main attraction.
Then, back on the water, and a little ways further down, we get to the Staircase. Now, this is the fun one, the main attraction, if you will. The river seems to drop nearly 100 feet in only a quarter mile in this stretch. Again, the waters churn and froth. "All FORWARD! Keep paddling!" the guide tells us. We do. The boat picks up speed, and seems to get tossed around like a washing machine, but I keep my feet hooked in as I paddle through the white water. But on a particularly big standing wave, my buddy in front of me loses balance and flips backward, and his upper body lands in the water even though his foot is still hooked into the boat. Miraculously we catch his paddle and stow it before he loses it. Man down! The guide is now telling us, "All forward, PULL MARCO IN! All forward PULL MARCO IN!!!" I am grabbing his life jacket with one hand, trying to pull him in but I'm getting tossed around as well and it's hard. After about a dozen stairs down the staircase, both me and the guy to Marco's right do eventually manage to pull him back into the boat, and somehow, the other paddlers manage to keep the boat on course through all this insanity. But all of us are just cackling like mad dogs, soaking wet, loving every second of it.
A couple more lesser rapids, and then we get to the Last Big One. Like the Staircase, this one has tons of huge standing waves, troughs, and places that will toss hapless rafters airborne. (Of course, this happens to us too. But don't worry...spoiler...we make it.) The guide warns us about "Seymore." This is a huge whirlpool that we have to dodge on the way through this section. "They call it Seymore, because you see more lost helmets, life jackets, and wrecked boats there than anywhere else on the river," the guide tells us. (Ha ha, I get it. River guides like bad puns.) We manage to avoid Seymore, along with numerous other rocks and obstacles, as we race down through the foam and spray. By now, our crew is a well oiled machine, paddling left-side, right-side, then all-forward, according to the "Captain," and easily navigating through all this nuttiness.
After we get to a long flat water section, the "Captain" tells us we can get out and swim here, so we say, F%^ it, I'm already wet, may as well jump all the way in. That was fun. Then, we scramble back into the boat. There are a couple minor rapids, then the confluence where the north fork joins up with the main river. Take-out is just a little ways past that. (Ugh, portaging the boat onto the shore and then helping to load it onto the trailer is the only unpleasant...heck, it's not THAT unpleasant. It's part of the whole deal.)
So, overall, this was just an epic fuckin' day. Whenever I think of good times, I think of this trip; I was buzzing about it the whole week, with a shit eating grin on my face at the office, thinking about it. I wanted to post about something fun instead of depressing crap, so hopefully this was at least somewhat fun to read, even though there is nothing like the real experience. If you ever get a chance to go on a guided rafting trip on the Payette River, just frickin' do it. Anyway that's about it, see ya.