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Steellover

Random thoughts. Some of them will be erotic and kink-related, but some of them won't be, and as such people might find them boring. Some will be related to personal fantasies, but some to personal experiences as well.
4 months ago. July 30, 2024 at 11:57 PM

One day, descending down some old rabbit hole, I came across some youtube thing where, for a reason that wasn't really clear at that time, someone had put together a six-disc compilation of old ballroom and ragtime music from the 1920s, 30s, and 40's.  "Dark Ambient" was the category, however. Well, what could be so dark about old ballroom music?  I mean, what could possibly go wrong?  Curious, I started listening. 

The first disc was just what it sounded like, rich, old-timey ballroom and ragtime music, though admittedly it did have a rather unsettlingly weird quality to it. Like it was SUPPOSED to sound old and faded, somehow.  Not my usual listening tastes, which generally run towards alternative rock, metal, and punk, but...hey this is different. Maybe good for some halloween haunted ballroom party mix or something.  Though the track "Slightly bewildered" sounded almost strange, like there was a glitch in the disc, or a weird skip; like maybe there was a scratch on it or something.  Turns out, no; this wasn't the case. It was supposed to sound like that. Ominously foreshadowing perhaps.

Disc 2 though, it was like the songs were slower, more tired sounding, more depressing and more faded, and the overall mood was lower.  Kind of depressing music, if you ask me. Even the titles were depressing, like "Glimpses of Hope in Trying Times" and "Surrendering to Despair."  Somehow I pictured the 1920s as being happier times.

The third volume was where things got weird. The ballroom music was still there, only it was more echoey, distant, and distorted, and the songs became increasingly fragmented and disjointed sounding as it played on. This was the type of music you would play for a haunted house party, for sure. Sometimes it would just fade out into a shimmer of feedback noise.  Okay, by now it was clear this wasn't just a compilation of old ballroom music, there was definitely something really, disturbingly off here.

Volume four was like- indescribable. Sonic gibberish. Instead of ten to twelve four minute tracks, we had four 19-20 minute tracks that were just collages of gibberish- broken fragments of ballroom music playing over top of each other, playing backwards, or flipping back and forth like a broken radio, over static. And at one point, it was like the radio abruptly tuned into what sounded like a world war 2 documentary, with loud angry brass instruments. The songs were titled "Post Awareness Confusions parts 1-3" and "Temporary Bliss State," which sounded more eerie and alien than blissful, to be honest.  My first thought was, is this SUPPOSED to sound like this?  Apparently yes it is; and it became clear by now that all of this was symbolizing one thing- the sound of a mind unravelling, losing one's sanity, falling into oblivion.

The fifth volume was pure nightmare fuel.  Nothing but dissonant noise and chaos, though occasionally, early on, a bit of old, scratchy 1920's music would break through the static, only to fade back into dissonant chaos after a few seconds.  Tracks were titled "Synapse Retrogenesis" and "Advanced Plaque Entanglements."  Is THIS what your thoughts are supposed to be like when your mind dissolves?  That is probably more terrifying than the music (if you can even call it that) that was playing through the speakers at this point.  

Volume 6- I would describe the last volume simply as the sounds of entropy, or sounds of the void. Waves of rolling static and deep rumbling drones, though occasionally random piano notes and what sounded like an opera singer could be heard beneath the noise.  The final track had this curiously melodic drone that was almost uplifting, before giving way to a singing choir, and was called "Place in the world fades away."  The symbolism being quite clear there.  This was death- growing madness over six volumes of deteriorating music followed by death. As I researched more, apparently the creator was inspired to create this work by the slow degenerative process of alzheimers on the human brain, which makes the whole thing even more disturbing when viewed in that light.  Having lost close family members to this disease, it does give me some insight to what they were going through, and it is horrific.

Six hours of old creepy ballroom music?  What could possibly go wrong? 

Everything.

So that's all I got. See ya.

intenseoldman​(dom male) - That's usually not the kind of torture masochists crave. Any way I could get a copy of this for my dungeon ;)
4 months ago
Steellover​(sub male) - Look up the title, "Everywhere at the End of Time."
4 months ago
Gelsemium​(sub female) - That sounds so creepy!
4 months ago

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