im becoming more and more tired as time goes on. I don't think tired covers it, flat might be a better word anyway... Im tired of having to keep putting myself back together. Things happen in life that can stick with you, even when delt with. Im tired of having my head put in a blender every few years or at least that's what it feels like.
Im good at being strong but the truth is its exhausting. It would be nice to not have to, to have the option.
Im also tired of keeping my walls up, they are getting heavy; but they are there for good reasons.
Im tired of not being respected as a single woman. Of the messages requesting kik or images or unwanted images being sent to me.
im considering going back to vanilla, even though i know my identity as sub.
the one thing that's stopping me is its often worse.
(after posting this, im likely to get messages 😞)