Why does Phoenix have the desires she has? Why does she crave being restrained, completely at her master's mercy? Why does pain heighten her pleasure?
The best answer she has is the past created them as a way to gain strength from the tramatic experiences she survived.
Being restrained by a family member as they took advantage of her at the tender age of 13 not only physically but also emotionally could have been the catalyst needed to spark the fire that now rages inside her every time she's unable to move, unable to get away, faced with the knowledge she's unable to do anything but enjoy the experience...
Memories of her mother disciplining her using everything from a pair of tennis shoes to an oak butter churn paddle and anything else that happened to be in her hands at the time when she was younger and even trying to choke her in a fit of alcohol fueled rage make her wonder if these are the reason she equates pain to love and also pleasure...
Phoenix has so many questions and so few answers... she shakes ash from her fledgling feathers and attempts her first flight since rising from the ashes and embers .. a gentle breeze carrys her high above the twisted dark forest. She basks in the bright sunlight that is her master alex'sescape...
The past can wait, the present will be gone before she knows it, and the future isn't promised ... she is going to live in the moment and enjoy it while it lasts...
