As she's reflecting on more traits that make her unique in her search for her true self the Phoenix unearths one that makes her falter...her need to make sure people are pleased, happy, or to put a smile on the face of someone who is going through a rough time.
Her hangup with this trait is the fact that she will do just about anything to make those around her smile but isn't willing to just be a people pleaser for just anyone.
When she was younger she learned that most people don't care about their friends and family for any reason other than what they can get from them. It took her many years to learn this, during which she found herself sacrificing her own happiness and comfort for "friends" who couldn't be bothered to lift a finger if she was in need.
The Phoenix now has a better insight on the reason why she doesn't have many friends and tends to pull away from people when they get to close. She's become one of those people who doesn't call, text, or stop by for long periods of time but then it's like she's never been gone when she does.
Those lucky few who have the patience and determination to become close to her aren't considered friends, they become her family. People she would walk through fire for, move mountains for, that she will protect with everything she has. She's one of those souls you either love unconditionally or hate, there's no in-between.
Trust issues have created a complex need to serve and abide by the structure created for her conflicted by her need to push the boundaries and push away in order to test the strength of their love.
Another flap of her wings brings the Phoenix closer to the sun ..