I'm glad I am who I am. Nothing brings me more joy than the narcissism of saying how awesome and badass I am. But it doesn't always feel great. Sometimes those you wish to be friends with are afraid for some reason or another.
Whenever I became who I am it was before I worked out sixteen hours a day for six months straight. It was when I was bullied in school for my weight or my brain. It's wierd being this big having grown up so small.
I like nerdy things. Gaming , DnD, perpetual pattern equations, reading, writing, anime, and more. But usually when you dwarf your buddies several times over they don't care how many years they've known you the relationship has changed.
You aren't allowed to make rhetorical threats anymore because you've changed on the outside. They don't believe that you're still you. They don't think you can think as if biceps cut off brain function. They use you to threaten others. And still when people can't see you, you get bullied for the brain.
But what choice did I have? Intelligence tortures the mind and health comes from a sound mind within a sound body. One outpacing the other leaves the soul wanting. So I did what I had to. And I became awesome because of it.
