I just saw the following quote and boy did it resonate with me.
“If I am meant to be alone then please take away my desire to be loved. because it hurts to crave something i might never have. it hurts to look at people who have someone and wonder what it feels like to be chosen, to be held, to be loved the way i wish i could be. i get tired of pretending that being alone doesn't bother me. if being alone is truly what's meant for me, then please, take away this ache in my heart. take away this hope that someone will come, because it's painful to keep waiting for love that might never arrive.”
It’s hard to want something so badly, and yet to feel like it is floating just outside of your grasp. My life is good, don’t get me wrong. Good job, amazing family, great friends…..and yet there feels like there is one piece missing. And I’m truly happy for those who have found what they are looking for. And a little envious if I’m being honest with myself. I fluctuate between thinking I’m too much and not enough in the same breath. And logically I know that, for the right person, I will be everything for them. I’ve been doing the self examination and work for several years and feel that I’m in a good place and ready. I’ve tried to be patient (not one of my stronger virtues). Praying this test of patience brings me what my heart desires.