Submissive chris

i love being frightened and vulnerable as I walk to meet a new man ready to do anything sexually he demands. i love being a gay cock slave whose purpose in life is to please men.
 
i have parked on the street near the hotel. i feel like the whore i always wanted to be with no will of my own and no respect from anyone.
 
Men consider me a secret utility – a thing they order up at will who obeys them, adores them, serves them and is dismissed when a man is satisfied.
 
As I walk a man passes by me. I wish he knew i am wearing Women’s panties under my pants.  I wish he knew that my clutch contains condoms, lube, ass wash and mouth wash?
 
How I wish he would grab me, throw me to the ground, use my mouth and just leave me but he just continues walking away with no idea of the trashy me he has passed.
 
The man i am about to meet and service has been told about me from a friend. i love that men talk about me. I love that men talk about how far they can make me go and how desperate I am to please men.
 
He was tentative when we spoke. Would i do this for him – would I do that to him? The way he spoke was that what he wanted me to do was the dirtiest thing he could imagine.
 
When i when i said that i would do it all, I could hear his voice change and all respect for me disappeared and I could hear that he thought of me as trash and it excited me! I love it when people think of me as human trash available to be used.
 
i am at the entrance to the hotel now.  Automatic doors slide open and i modestly step inside. i want to walk with a swish so everyone will think of me as a faggot but I resist the temptation and move very straight. 
 
i cross the lobby and pass the bar where i spot a hooker waiting for a john. I am the free hooker tonight and my john is upstairs waiting for me. i hope he isn’t hard yet. i like getting men hard.
 
i stand in the back of the elevator as me and women get off before me and finally my floor and I find his room.  i straighten myself up and ring the bell. i hope he hasn’t changed his mind.
 
The door opens and after he looks me over, motions me to come in.  The door closes behind me and i get down on my knees. i hope i can please him.