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The Book of Counted Sorrows

Writings, poems,musings, short stories, rants, and who knows what else
2 years ago. June 17, 2022 at 2:14 AM

Depression...

 

It's a nefarious, vulgar, hateful spirit of the mind. An imbalance  in brain chemistry turns sunny days and greed landscapes into sepia and monochrome.

 

It steals mirth, joy, motivation, and even thought from the minds it posseses.

The Demon rests within your own skull all the time, on your throat when you wish to tell others how much you love them.

Sits on your tongue when you would rightfully defend yourself.

And sits on your lungs  when you would scream and cry in frustration or despair.

Despair, is what it turns everything into.

Happiness becomes empty.

Joy becomes guilty.

It corrupts upon everything  it latches onto.

It darkens every mood

Numbs every positive emotion 

And eventually  it even traps your rage.

 

Until it controls everything. Until it can push your buttons, enrage you, stop your thoughts, and rend you asunder within.

It breaks you by breaking those you love.

Until you question  your sanity, and your right to live.

Some it beats down into a voiceless husk of a human, others it works slowly on, pushing everyone away until it reaches its goal...

 

You....

ALONE.

 

 

Then it knows it has you. It's burned all the bridges, pushed away all help and hope. 

Until you are left alone in the dark, with a gun, or blade, or rope, or pills.....

And It.

And it's filthy lies...

That you are worthless..

A waste of skin..

Never wanted..

Never fit in..

Waste of Oxygen..

You are Garbage..

You are the Outcast..

You are the Plague..

You are the Pariah..

You are nothing.....

 

Until it's right....

 

 


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