What do we need? The answer is the same for men and women; indeed, for all animals. Food to eat and air to breathe. Perhaps, shelter. It’s not entirely clear that a capacity for desire is limited to humans, perhaps it is also a biological necessity for all living things: sexual desire as an impetus for survival.
Human desire has become distorted. We yearn for things we have no need for, we seek satisfaction in artifacts, we prize inanimate objects over human intimacy. We value power, autonomy, and individualism. In this environment, sexual desire is also distorted. In women, it is repressed, vilified, denied. As women seek equal power in all realms, men are either emasculated, or they become cruel and hateful toward women. No one can be satisfied in this environment.
The desire to serve is not just a sexual dynamic. Most important relationships have a built-in power structure, based on dominance and submission: parent/child, student/teacher, employer/employee. In order to learn, someone must teach. In order to grow, someone must nourish. Played out erotically, this dynamic is expressed in its purest form. It allows for the shedding of built-up layers of repression and inhibition by the woman, and the assertion of natural dominance by the man. Stripping a woman down to her purest essence frees and purifies her.
It is through service that a woman can find her true purpose, and real gratification. It is through vulnerability that she can find truth, because naked on her knees there is nothing else to see but who she really is.
There is power in the trust required to bare oneself completely, and to turn over one’s autonomy to another. There is pleasure in pleasing, and worshiping someone who is giving you the gift of your own truth. To beg is to express one’s devotion to the discovery of a shared truth. It’s the purest expression of desire unleashed, and freed from repression. It’s not sexual release that’s being sought when one begs, its a request to serve more, worship more, be used more. The sense of purpose found in serving is what ignites a submissive’s sexual desire, so that it becomes the service she craves even more than eventual, erotic satisfaction.