Rigjt now, I am 50. I have been a submissive long before I knew what that meant. It is a natural part of me, and not something I can just turn off.
I have had some D/s relationships in the past that did not work out, for various reasons, and two of those were collared ones. When any relationship fails, I tend to withdraw into myself to figure out what I did wrong.
That is a fallacy.
First, it is not always my fault. Yes, I make mistakes,but I admit them. If I see a situation for what it is, and red flags flying like the wind, I am in my right to walk away, certainly more so when a potential Dominant doesn't speak to me with no explanation, does not get to know my mind, and feels everything is the submissive's fault, period. No. That is simply not always the case.
Another fallacy...my age makes me undesireable. Well, for some, perhaps. Those are the ones who choose to look only on the surface, rather than get to know the true me. I am more than big blue eyes and a smile. I read, am creative, love real, equally shared conversations. The romance along with the kink. I am far from stupid and will stand up for myself. If anything, my age has blessed me with wisdom, experience, and the ability to learn things I may not have otherwise. Just because I am 50, doesn't mean I am dead and yes, everything works very well. Stereotypes are not always true.
Another fallacy...you cannot be submissive with kids in the home. Au contraire. In fact, there are a variety of ways to be very subtle with the relationship and the children never know. Wearing a certain color. Not wearing certain clothing. A touch or a glance that appears innocent, but known only between the two. Intimate moments that are not sexual in nature that create a stronger, loving bond. Creativity is essential, as well as mastering discretion.
These have been a few of the negatives I have encountered, but that will never stop me. Knowing what you want is the first step in knowing yourself,and once you can do that AND clearly articulate that to a potential Dominant, more successful interactions will find you. If the person doesn't align with what you seek, keep moving.
Everything will be okay, and that is NOT a fallacy.