Katastrophe incarnate

   Darlings! You know by now your Lady has a varied and delightful wardrobe.
         Some color, much black, loads of corsets and all sinful. 
       Do you think this perhaps has any bearing on my story for you today? 

    Those who’ve guessed correctly, Good job. 

         Those who didn’t, how disappointing. 

   You find me a bit excitable, darlings, Lady Kat has had such fun. It’s been a few days of self care and pampering. 

     I’ve had my faithful servant pamper me, exfoliating, massaging, shaving and moisturizing my body. I’ve had my body properly pampered as I haven’t had the time for in months. 

     I also dyed my hair the way I wanted it, purple to blue to green, in a mermaid/sea dragon sort of color pallet. I chose to pincurl it, and style it the way I wanted today. I do look good in vintage styles. 

     The makeup is an afterthought of course but drama is my go to. Perhaps I should worry about all the clown inspired makeup popping up on my Pinterest, but the Joker inspired look caught my eye. How could I resist a villain look? 

      Honestly, I was going to be good. 

   Well….. as good as I ever am. 

   Why I wound up in the store today? Does that really matter? What was I wearing, well I couldn’t let this hair and makeup go to waste! And honestly, a black corset over a green blouse and black wiggle skirt is conservative for me! I even wore tights in deference to the weather.   

      Well, my dears, what happens when Lady Kat goes out into the public sphere, on a rainy Sunday, dressed like herself? 

   Chaos and Fuckery! As always. 

  So let’s take the tally, darlings? 

Number of men nursing cases of whiplash watching me walk by? Six, possibly more. 

Number of religious ladies scurrying across the store rather than walk near me? Four, one nearly tripped on her denim skirt when I definitely did not snort at her abrupt about face. 

Number of Karens with enough audacity to try and speak to me? Just one. 

    She thought I’d be shamed into covering up after her little speech. Mostly consisting of questioning both my self respect and self esteem. 

      Cute, huh? 

   I undid another button on my blouse. Her poor husband looked like Father Christmas brought his present early. Especially when I leaned forward to smile and wish his wife “Happy Holidays” when she started impersonating a particularly unfortunate looking  trout someone caught and couldn’t decide whether or not it was worth throwing back. 

Oddly enough the young man on register and his friend who retrieved the carts were terribly helpful about bagging and then loading my purchases into my car for me. Kind of them in this miserable weather, don’t you think lovelies? ? 

  Center yourself. 

  Slow your breathing, concentrate. 
  The target is just far enough away to be a challenge. 
   
   You must aim carefully. The wind, the distance, the size of the target itself. All are factors you must gauge. 
  Breath after breath. 

   Slow and steady. 

    No quaking in the limbs. Each muscle poised. 

   You draw back, the motion measured with years of practice and you release. 

   Your arrow finds the target, just as the five before it have. 

  Five center hits followed by the sixth. 

  Archery practice is over. 

    The energy hasn’t dissipated, but the ache in your shoulders says this must be the last set tonight. 

     Tomorrow’s practice may go longer, no need for a spotlight either. 

Cursing 

Crying 

Screaming 

Bleeding

   All bouncing around an overfilled mind. 

Hold on

Let go

Feel it all

Take a Deep Breath

        It will all be ok. 

Hello darlings! I’m sure you all missed me terribly of course but  just look at that! I’m back! 

   I’m afraid I return in a proper moods, dears. Today I dragged myself away from my cozy home for the toil and strife of dealing with a whining mother and a sniffly four year old after a less than pleasant morning preparing for holiday shenanigans I’m not even celebrating. 

   My garter belt keeps detaching from the stocking and I’ve already dealt with more than my fair share of idiocy over my thighs being remotely visible. You’d think some people have never seen a lady fix a stocking. 

Honestly. 

It’s terribly cold these past few days, making my preference for wearing as little as possible rather tricky. 

   So I’ve taken to wearing my favorite vintage lingerie under my everyday clothes. 

   Today it’s a fantastic green velvet set, complete with delicate black lace and a charming little row of tiny mother of pearl buttons fastening the tap pants and brassiere. 

    Has anyone besides myself seen this stunning little set? Not just yet. When I have my partner help me undress, one might say he’s in for quite the surprise. 

   Tomorrow I may choose the purple silk set, or perhaps the blue lace slip if a dress more suits my mood. But honestly, who can blame me wanting to feel a little sexier when traipsing about my normal day to day tasks? Especially when I have to wear my heavy coat anyways?

   Ah well, slipping out of this sweater and skirt tonight should be quite the treat. Especially once he notices the stockings. 

Darlings I’m alive if unwell. 

Your lovely Lady Kat is down with an ear infection and a case of strep throat! Can you imagine my displeasure?!?

Just last night I was enjoying some fantastic quality time with my partner. My every need seen to! 

  Today I wake to the world muffled, a water balloon of lava sloshing just behind each eardrum, and a mildly sore throat from drainage! 

  At least the doctor I saw today was nice, young and flirty, with a charming smile and nice eyes. I can’t deny enjoying that part of the visit, even if the diagnosis and required follow ups won’t be half as pleasant. 

  Ah well, I’m alive and being seen to, and I’ve got a lovely cup of tea courtesy my devoted partner. 

Distract me. 
 Stop my worries. 

  Hold my hand through the fear. 

   I won’t break. 

     I can’t let it win.  
        When it’s over I’ll be stronger. 
      I won’t let it win. 
   Nothing will break me. 

  You’re with me. 

This will pass. 

To be a Lady is to control one’s emotions. 

That’s why the anger bubbling away in me is at a simmer, not boiling out and all over those unfortunate enough to be near me. 

Some disgusting individuals have behaved with such malice I’m unsure my composure will hold for me to relay the details. Despite my anger the warning should be given. 

  People are taking seemingly innocent images from vile videos, things most people agree shouldn’t exist. They take the image, apply an innocuous caption and because the image is from where it’s from, the account is deleted and reported for such materials. So please be careful of odd memes and things from people you don’t know terribly well. 

    From where im sitting this is pure malice and I don’t want to imagine the type of person who’d do such things. 

For now I’m going to take a breath, and a break, reminding myself I’m a lady, and this is too will pass. 

Halloween is upon us and the madness has crept in as usual. 

  As I’ve got another three events over the next few days. I may not be on much over the next few days. 

Fear not darlings! I will return after the madness relents! 

  Till then, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do, which leaves those options rather wide open! 

EFFORT 

  Practice, labour, work, all these words synonyms for the only way being me happens! 

  I don’t roll out of bed, perfectly put together, hair coiffed, clothing perfect, face made up! 

   I have to dress, and style, and prepare, and work! 

   I don’t appear in public perfectly poised by chance. I don’t look like a Pin Up by accident. 

   Granted the curves I’m blessed with are helpful in achieving that look. Won’t lie, I do use the natural resources I’m provided with to my best advantage. 

   But using them properly is still work. One doesn’t disregard the corset just because the natural curves are already defined. 

    Now why am I ranting about effort? 

  Well darlings, I was verbally assaulted by vanilla relatives today about my mode of dress. 
a dress and long socks, with my face done and boots. Please don’t stone me, I’m but a simple lovely Lady! 

   See with these relatives, I can’t win. If I appear in yoga pants and no makeup, I’m not taking pride in my appearance. If I’m wearing my usual makeup and vintage-ish pinup goth style, I’m too dressed up and covering my lovely face. If I’m wearing jeans and a band shirt with light makeup, I’m still slovenly and should spruce myself up a bit. No wins to be found here. 

    So I’m here, ranting, because I looked fantastic today, and practiced the makeup i want for Halloween’s Witch of the Web look, and all I got was a twenty minute lecture on glorifying witchcraft and how my favorite holiday is corrupting my family. 

    My partner was born on Halloween, our family is going to go all out no matter what. As to glorifying witchcraft, as the proud witch goth Lady, yet another ship that has long since sailed. Now excuse me while I make myself look even more pansexual just to get the full effect of everything that bugs that side of the family.