lHARLEYQUONN(masochist female)

I just don’t know how to feel

I just don’t know how to feel
I just don’t know how to feel anymore one day I am not one day I am here
I miss the person that was strong bold but was I ever or did I just do as I am was told.
I thought we were meant to be but faith did not mean for it to happen.
I would have given up everything just for you.
But a man like you who was I kidding you were never mine but I was yours.
I would have given you 200% control over me, but GOD had other intentions I guess.
That a man like you was just out of my reach I would never have a man I wanted never
Man why is it hurting so bad when I think he is laughing enjoying himself not giving me no second thought.
I know it is something he is not even contemplating if he ever had feelings for me. I think it was all just a game
For him not for me
I did not just wanted a Dom I wanted a best friend a partner nothing more nothing less.
Now I am left with a broken heart I have to pick up the pieces and move on while he just moves onto the next one
I am devastated I don’t know what to do.
There is Nothing for you to do Michele he is done he gave up let it go move on like you always have yes you are getting older but you’ve got this. You can do this.
That’s what I am telling myself will it work only time will tell.
He is a ghost today a day later.
It’s like he was never there but still is.

No more days Just thoughts

1 year ago. April 9, 2023 at 12:46 PM

So yesterday I met this guy and yes I know I know it is a crazy story but maybe some of you can relate some of you maybe most of you may not

As I was saying I met this guy and he was pretty persistent in messaging me. So I said to myself he will not give up let’s chat

So we moved to another app to chat and he had asked me if my end goal was to be collared I said well yes isn’t that what everyone is looking for.

So we talked about spiritual things like religion and such,

and than he says I would like to own you I took it as a joke he was serious offered me a contract. I was like no way lol this guy is crazy but I played along.

He then says that I should call him Sir since he owned me now. I was like what is he talking about. He said yes we have a virbal agreement I did not think that I agreed to anything until I mentioned to him he does not own me and that I am indeed still talking to other Doms he got angry told me you tell them right now that I own you and not to contact you again.

I was shell shocked being part of my childhood I suffered very much the same abuse of being told I am ugly you get the whole thing so I did tell everyone that I had a Dom and Not to contact me and I did the same to the one person that means the world to me my English Gent. I hadn’t even seen a picture of this guy I stopped said to myself Kara WTF and moved as fast as I could I tried to delete my message to my baby but it was too late he had already read it. I said Fucking hell. Told the guy I couldn’t I forgot I asked him for a picture told him that I could do it.

The damage is done I lost a good friend that will never speak to me again. But I pray that you will forgive me this time I fucked up. Royally but I hope we will move past this. I promise it will never happen again I never broke a promise and I never will. Please forgive me. To my friend that I lost yes it’s you I am sorry that I did that you were kind to me and I just did what I did. But people make mistake even at my age no one is perfect

Though we all thrive to be perfect.

Leave me your feedback

Thank you for reading

FYI This is my personal Journey and Thank GOD for freedom of Speech

Happy Easter Everyone

Kara

lHARLEYQUONN(masochist female) - Meant Couldn't instead of Could

1 year ago

LaVieEnRose(sub female){Kintsugi} - I know we’ve talked about attachment and so I’ll point out that after your recent break up this is a pretty good indicator for something called sub frenzy, this is when you will fall in and out of situations with Doms without taking the time to care for yourself. Again, been there, done that and I have the t-shirt. I can only point out that the best thing is to focus on you and deal with the hurt from your previous break up before even contemplating a dynamic with someone else.

1 year ago

lknforreal(dom male) - Sounds as if you came across one of many wannabes on sites like this. I say this because a true dominant will know that your submission is earned through trust and time. It also requires consent by the submissive in order for someone to claim to be Your dominant!
Do not allow someone to try to take advantage of your submissive nature and push themselves on you. That is a big red flag that should simply discard his attempt to push you into something that obviously it's not a true beginning of a lifestyle dynamic.
Keep your walls high keep yourself safe from these wannabes and make them earn your trust and your submission.

1 year ago

SlothForce1(dom male) - A good Dom will create the environment that you will feel comfortable enough to submit in. Finding someone who is patient enough and whom you click well enough with to create that space takes time, and many will come and go in that time. You seem like you are devoted and hard working, someone will come along who can see that and be willing to put in the time and care you deserve.

1 year ago

AdamDragon(dom male) - Again, this is why consideration is important. Taking time to get to know each other and with no demands. To claim and own you over such a short time is completely wrong and ridiculous. As a long standing Dominant, if you were to agree to this in such a short time that would be a red flag for Me. So in essence, that particular “Dom” has no experience in the true lifestyle.
Be safe, take your time and eyes wide open 🌹

1 year ago

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lHARLEYQUONN​(masochist female)

I just don’t know how to feel

No more days Just thoughts

lHARLEYQUONN(masochist female)